¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

cheap long lasting

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼­*ȯ
2022-07-04 625

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

umm maybe it is hard question..because each people think different about that issue. but in my opinion i love cheap one. you know
we have to consider every part of the product when we buy something. but if we buy long lasting product there must be some bad part. you know long lasting things are expensive right? after i buy long lasting things and find some error on it. i can't litter it because it is expensive!! but when i buy cheap one i can easliy throw away. so l think cheap produt is more efficient

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Robin!
Thanks for this essay.  Another tip for you to increase your score is to use various vocabulary or expressions.  Use synonyms and not only the same words in your answer.  That's how native speakers do it. ^^


~T. Maine

umm maybe it is hard question..because each people think different about that issue. 
>>Maybe it is a hard question because each person thinks differently about this issue. 
but in my opinion i love cheap one. 
>>But in my opinion I love a cheap one. 
you know we have to consider every part of the product when we buy something. 
>>You know we have to consider each part of the product when we buy something. 
but if we buy long lasting product there must be some bad part. 
>>But if we buy a long-lasting product there must be some bad parts of it. 
you know long lasting things are expensive right? 
>>You know long-lasting things are expensive, right?
after i buy long lasting things and find some error on it.  i can't litter it because it is expensive!! 
>>After I buy long-lasting things and find some errors in them, I can't throw them away because they are costly. 
but when i buy cheap one i can easliy throw away. 
>>But when I buy cheap ones, I can easily put them away. 
so l think cheap produt is more efficient
>>So I think cheap products are more efficient and useful in some ways. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124591 Use the following words in sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 1005
124590 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 549
124589 Vacuum cleaner! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 2089
124588 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 3
124587 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 800
124586 Have you ever experienced being harassed or have ever been a... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 839
124585 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 1
124584 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 0
124583 If he would contact you, and says. \"Hi\" what will you say?... ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 0
124582 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 1096
124581 humiliation ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 741
124580 How were your Christmas Eve and Christmas day? Share in a few... ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 0
124579 Santa\'s secerets ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 666
124578 How often do you read the newspaper? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 949
124577 2.Jan.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-03 1
124576 Should people stop eating fast food? Why or why not? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 1045
124575 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 0
124574 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 3
124573 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 927
124572 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 1053

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04