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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

homework and advice

작성자: 김*우
2022-07-02 608

회원님의 영작문

Good morning, Donna~
I had a hard time yesterday, because Chief team leader in my clinic quit the job.
I think I'll go through a harder time about my work for a while so I am depressed.
However I'll get over this situation, and I really hope so.
Anyway this is my homework.
We can usually get tired of every trip, so we can easily sensitive.
Sometimes my wife and I argued about tiny things.
Actually it doesn't matter, but such situations can lead us wrong way.
And now I realized that our trip should be more comfortable, convenient and have more free time.
After changing my strategies of trip, we don't fight anymore.
From now on, I'll give you an advice.
You have coughed more than 2 weeks.
So I am worried about your health.
It's possible you got complications of COVID or other lung diseases.
Every diseases are not matters if they treated early.
I experienced many cases that late diagnosis causes bad results.
So, I strongly recommend you to go to the hospital.
Always be healthy~~

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good evening, Dr. Kim!

Apologies for being a little late in giving your homework feedback. This is the first time today that I can sit on my couch after a very long day of hustling and bustling. 

I am sorry to hear that your Chief Team Leader quit his post. Your clinic must have been surprised of his decision. Now, you have to make some adjustments to cope with this situation. Nonetheless, I know that you are capable of doing your best in these dire times. The former Chief must have a valid reason for leaving. 

Meanwhile, your realization about travel entails so much maturity and selflessness. In my country, it is advised for couples to travel together before marriage to know each other deeply and manage differences. In your case, your travel as a married couple taught you to let go of your ego to please your wife. That is sweet. Then for your next travel, I hope there will be no hassles. 

Finally, last Saturday, I went to see a doctor. She suspected that I might have gotten pneumonia that causes the recurring pain around my rib cage. She prescribed me medicines which I will tell you in class in the morning. I realized how stubborn I can be at times and I am grateful to your gentle reminder of how health must be our top priority. Thank you very much. ~

Your writing had very smooth transition. Your points were very clear. The details are on point. You are a great writer, carry on! 

Rest well and see you in a few.

-T. Donna ~

Good morning, Donna~
>> Correct!
Or: Good morning, Donna!

I had a hard time yesterday, because Chief team leader in my clinic quit the job.
>> I had a hard time yesterday because the Chief Team Leader in my clinic quit his job.

I think I'll go through a harder time about my work for a while so I am depressed.
>> Correct!

However I'll get over this situation, and I really hope so.
>> Correct!

Anyway this is my homework.
>> Correct!
Or: Anyway, this is my homework.

We can usually get tired of every trip, so we can easily sensitive.
>> We can usually get tired of every trip, so we can easily (get/ be) sensitive.

Sometimes my wife and I argued about tiny things.
>> Correct!

Actually it doesn't matter, but such situations can lead us wrong way.
>> Actually it doesn't matter, but such situations can lead us to the wrong way.

And now I realized that our trip should be more comfortable, convenient and have more free time.
>> And now I realize that our trip should be more comfortable, convenient, and have more free time.

After changing my strategies of trip, we don't fight anymore.
>> After changing my strategies of having a trip, we don't fight anymore.

From now on, I'll give you an advice.
>> Correct!

You have coughed more than 2 weeks.
>> Correct!

So I am worried about your health.
>> Correct!

It's possible you got complications of COVID or other lung diseases.
>> It's possible that you got complications of COVID or other lung diseases.

Every diseases are not matters if they treated early.
>> Every disease does not matters if they are treated early.

I experienced many cases that late diagnosis causes bad results.
>> Correct!
Or: I experienced many cases when late diagnosis caused bad results.

So, I strongly recommend you to go to the hospital.
>> Correct

Always be healthy~~
>> Correct!
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