무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

can you give some examples when the common man has an edge over a celebrity?

작성자: 신*진
2022-06-30 394

회원님의 영작문

In my opinion, the most apparent edge that distinguish between common people and celebrity is money. There are lots of people who upload videos in youtube and post scripts in other SNSs. But we don't call all of them as a celebrity, So, for me, the people who make money through SNS activities can be called as celebrities because the fact that they can earn money means that they are influentive enough to be called as celebrities. I don't really know that how the system works but it is already famous that all of youtubers have to have more that 1k subscribers to apply youtube for themselves to do financial activity. So it means that youtube let only celebrities to earn money. Furthermore, the most popular way that instagram influencers can make money is the advertisement from the diverse companies. It seems like that the advertisement preceded in the famous channel can bring out significant economic benefit. And influence is the criteria that can decide which channel can afford.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hey, Sue. Job well done with this homework as well. I appreciate the effort you put into answering the homework. Good job and I look forward to more. ~Teacher Jane ^___^


In my opinion, the most apparent edge that distinguish between common people and celebrity is money. 
>> In my opinion, money is the most apparent edge that distinguishes between common people and celebrities. 

There are lots of people who upload videos in youtube and post scripts in other SNSs. 
>> There are lots of people who upload videos on YouTube and post scripts on other SNSs. 

But we don't call all of them as a celebrity, So, for me, the people who make money through SNS activities can be called as celebrities because the fact that they can earn money means that they are influentive enough to be called as celebrities. 
>> But we don't call all of them celebrities so for me, the people who make money through SNS activities can be called celebrities because the fact that they can earn money means that they are influential enough to be called celebrities. 

I don't really know that how the system works but it is already famous that all of youtubers have to have more that 1k subscribers to apply youtube for themselves to do financial activity. 
>> I don't really know how the system works but it is already widely known that all YouTubers have to have more than 1k subscribers in order to gain profit/ finances. 

So it means that youtube let only celebrities to earn money. 
>> So it means that YouTube allows only celebrities to earn money. 

Furthermore, the most popular way that instagram influencers can make money is the advertisement from the diverse companies. 
>> Furthermore, the most popular way that Instagram influencers can make money is the advertisement from diverse companies. 

It seems like that the advertisement preceded in the famous channel can bring out significant economic benefit. 
>> It seems like the advertisement preceded in the famous channel can bring out significant economic benefit. 

And influence is the criteria that can decide which channel can afford.
>> And influence is the criteria that can decide which channel can gain more profits. 

번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
122484 Homework 김*서 완료 2022-09-20 2841
122483 9/20 homework 윤*현 완료 2022-09-20 1734
122482 Why is it important to understand how dinosaurs lived? 구*우 완료 2022-09-20 1340
122481 Talk about three ways you have fun at home. 이*태 완료 2022-09-20 1786
122480 Is a concert better than a festival? Answer in a few sentences. 이*연 완료 2022-09-20 1985
122479 Where can you find so many rocks? 김*율 완료 2022-09-20 2829
122478 What do you like to do to relax during the weekend? 태*서 완료 2022-09-20 1960
122477 Homework 김*우 완료 2022-09-20 1708
122476 How would you ask a stranger for help? 최*교 완료 2022-09-20 1752
122475 homework 박*민 완료 2022-09-20 3
122474 What was your dream job? 신*섭 완료 2022-09-20 2801
122473 The slender body. 김*윤 완료 2022-09-20 2227
122472 HOMEWORK: If something is annoying you, what do you usually do?... 김*욱 완료 2022-09-20 2417
122471 What do you think will be the long term results of continuous... 황*하 완료 2022-09-20 1679
122470 homework 박*은 완료 2022-09-20 1
122469 Have you ever been outside your comfort zone? Please tell me a... 류*주 완료 2022-09-20 1724
122468 Tuesday Homework 류*우 완료 2022-09-20 1595
122467 homework 하*주 완료 2022-09-20 1561
122466 Do you have a favorite sport? What is it? Tell me about its rules 박*태 완료 2022-09-20 1451
122465 Worry 민*정 완료 2022-09-20 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]