¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Should your country accept refugees? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹é*¿ø
2022-06-30 626

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Should your country accept refugees? Why or why not?

I think South Korea is hard to live for refugees. Because there are only few facilities to help refugees. And the price of houses is very expensive for them, especially in Seoul (It is our capital city). It¡¯s because the South Korea has small territory.
So I don¡¯t suggest them to come to the South Korea.

It is hard to upload the text to files.. I can only write it on this one.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Harry!
Congratulations for submitting your first homework! ^_^ You struggled to upload the texts but you still made it. 
I think you should directly write your homework here. 
By the  way, I loved reading your opinion about the matter on refugees.
I think not all countries are capable of taking them in. Even first world countries struggle to do so. 
But it's sometimes sad to see refugees not having any place to go. 
Sometimes, I think the world is unfair. T_T
Anyhow, I hope you're having a great day. ^^ 
I heard its gloomy and rainy out there again so stay warm, dry and safe. 
See you again tomorrow. ^^
~Teacher Charry



I think South Korea is hard to live for refugees. 
>> I think it's hard for South Korea to allow refugees to live here. 
Because there are only few facilities to help refugees. 
>> It's because there are only few facilities here that can help refugees. 
And the price of houses is very expensive for them, especially in Seoul (It is our capital city). 
>> In addition, the price of houses is very expensive for them especially in Seoul, which is our capital city. 
It¡¯s because the South Korea has small territory.
>> It¡¯s because South Korea is a small country. 
So I don¡¯t suggest them to come to the South Korea.
>> 
So I don¡¯t suggest them to come to South Korea.
It is hard to upload the text to files.. 
>> It is hard to upload the text to files. 
I can only write it on this one.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123931 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1063
123930 If you were a clothing item, what would you be and why? Please... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 2
123929 Homework (12/01) ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 5
123928 Are you generally a positive person or a negative person? How? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1509
123927 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 2
123926 30.Nov.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 2
123925 What kind of diet or meal plan do you have? Do you plan the food... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1050
123924 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1321
123923 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 0
123922 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1256
123921 An office policy ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 2
123920 ¼÷Á¦ Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1637
123919 I prayed in the name of Jesus, entrusting the beginning and end... ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1147
123918 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1
123917 What\'s the best way to get to the library? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1
123916 What is your first reaction to problems? Do you panic/ analyze... Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 2181
123915 What do you do to improve your health nowadays? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 0
123914 11/30 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1333
123913 The problem with traveling by airplane. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-11-30 2182
123912 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-30 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04