¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think you can be a minimalist?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*Çö
2022-06-29 276

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I'm not minimalist. I want to get something. I will get a lot of electric equipment. Later, I will use them when I become a programmer. I am greedy that I want to own many laptops and computers and much electric equipment.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good morning Jay!
Sure thing for a young mind like you have so many ideas! It's normal to have this kind off attitude  because it is your way of expressing your thoughts.
Thank you for your homework today and I have some few suggestions on how to write your sentence. keep learning :)
T. Aki~
I'm not minimalist. 
>>> CORRECT
I want to get something. 
>>> CORRECT
OR >>> There are still some things that I want to get.
I will get a lot of electric equipment. 
>>> I plan to get  lot of electronic equipment.
Later, I will use them when I become a programmer. 
>>> CORRECT
I am greedy that I want to own many laptops and computers and much electric equipment.
>>> I think I am greedy that I want to own many laptops and computers and more electronic equipment.



¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120999 What is the best thing to do to stay healthy? Do you consider... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 2023
120998 Among those you are not related to, who has helped you most in... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 448
120997 Are men better chefs than women or are women better chefs than... ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 294
120996 What is your best school memory and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 346
120995 Why do you think students get bad grades? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 469
120994 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 425
120993 I don¡¯t want to sleep in the jungle. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 599
120992 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 603
120991 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 0
120990 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 626
120989 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 328
120988 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 2
120987 How Has Your Experience Prepared You for This Role or position? À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 555
120986 About being organized. ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 1
120985 How can the nutrients in dairy foods improve the body¡¯s ability... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 701
120984 Sleeping Patterns Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 1
120983 homewokr Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 424
120982 Do you think diets are useful or not? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 3
120981 Tell me the most important lesson that your parents taught you? ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 338
120980 Describe a stressful experience ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-22 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04