¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think you can be a minimalist?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*Çö
2022-06-29 413

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I'm not minimalist. I want to get something. I will get a lot of electric equipment. Later, I will use them when I become a programmer. I am greedy that I want to own many laptops and computers and much electric equipment.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good morning Jay!
Sure thing for a young mind like you have so many ideas! It's normal to have this kind off attitude  because it is your way of expressing your thoughts.
Thank you for your homework today and I have some few suggestions on how to write your sentence. keep learning :)
T. Aki~
I'm not minimalist. 
>>> CORRECT
I want to get something. 
>>> CORRECT
OR >>> There are still some things that I want to get.
I will get a lot of electric equipment. 
>>> I plan to get  lot of electronic equipment.
Later, I will use them when I become a programmer. 
>>> CORRECT
I am greedy that I want to own many laptops and computers and much electric equipment.
>>> I think I am greedy that I want to own many laptops and computers and more electronic equipment.



¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122506 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 0
122505 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 0
122504 How do young people in your culture behave differently from... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1660
122503 It¡¯s not good for our health. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1592
122502 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 2214
122501 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 2345
122500 home work(?) ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1927
122499 homework ◡̈ ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1
122498 Greeting Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1
122497 09.21.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1
122496 What is the TV program you like watching? Tell me about that... ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1833
122495 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 0
122494 Seek ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1
122493 What are the possible benefits of working on weekends? Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1470
122492 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1
122491 20. Sep.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 3
122490 What do you usually do on weekends? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 2
122489 What body part or part of your appearance do you want to improve? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1
122488 Pet ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1255
122487 9/20 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1748

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04