¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

your child

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2022-06-28 964

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

We are making social system and policy that other people( govenrnent) raise ane take care of my children.

Yje number of workong moms is growing.

But she is not a working mom, she is willing to let take care of someone else her children.

Even the children enjoy materal abundance but lack interaction and communication with parents.

To conclude, we don't know each other very well.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Ms. Lily,
Time is the best thing we can invest to our children. Parents who may provide everything but do not give time to their children tend to become a stranger in the sight of their children. Have you heard that children who grew up with their nannies are much closer than with their moms.
Thank you for this!
Aki~

We are making social system and policy that other people( govenrnent) raise ane take care of my children.
>>> We are making a social system and policy that other people( government) raise and take care of my children.

Yje number of workong moms is growing.
>>>The number of working moms are growing.

But she is not a working mom, she is willing to let take care of someone else her children.
>>> But she is not a working mom, she is willing to let someone else take care of her children.

Even the children enjoy materal abundance but lack interaction and communication with parents.
>>> Even the children enjoy material abundance but lack interaction and communication with parents.

To conclude, we don't know each other very well.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117111 Why I think dancing is good exercise ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 608
117110 Why is English important to you? ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 10
117109 What do you think about abolishing the vaccination pass? Share... ³ë*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 4
117108 HOMEWORK ¹è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 1022
117107 If you were planning a party on a very small budget, what would... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 711
117106 Essay (Mar 2th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 432
117105 if you could make three wishes, what would they be? ¼Û*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 549
117104 Trustworthy ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 634
117103 What is the least favorite transportation and why? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 1
117102 Writing Task (Mar 4th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 640
117101 Why do you think playing a musical instrument is good for you? ÁÖ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 250
117100 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 325
117099 Do you want to act in a film? Answer in a few sentences. ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 511
117098 Do you prefer summer vacation or winter vacation? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 625
117097 Myself. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 3
117096 Do you prefer summer vacations or winter vacations? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 512
117095 If you can have your own business, what would it be and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 750
117094 My thoughts on what teenagers can do to contribute to society ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 457
117093 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 587
117092 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-07 845

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04