¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you worry about your health when you eat salty, sugary, and fatty food?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-06-27 765

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

No, not at all. I don't think of the calories what I eat because I don't still have any health problems until now. The only thing I consider is my belly. I was a guy who had slim body before my 30s. I don't remember when I have my belly. It's ok to have big belly but I sometimes feel uncomfortable due to it especially, I feel annoyed if I sit down on a chair. Koreans used to eat it's traditional food but it has changed a lot. Many people love eating western food. These changes cause some health problem like diabites, obesity and diseases related with stomach. Natually, people are interested in the nutrients what they have. We know less salty and sugar food help maintain healthy body, but it is not usually delicious. Although, it is important to know what to eat, I would have more delicious food instead of healthy food.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

No, not at all. 
>> CORRECT!
I don't think of the calories what I eat because I don't still have any health problems until now. 
>> I don't think about the calories of what I eat because I still don't have any health problems until now. 
The only thing I consider is my belly. 
>> CORRECT!
I was a guy who had slim body before my 30s. 
>> CORRECT!
I don't remember when I have my belly. 
>> I don't remember when I had my beer belly. 
It's ok to have big belly but I sometimes feel uncomfortable due to it especially, I feel annoyed if I sit down on a chair. 
>> CORRECT!
Koreans used to eat it's traditional food but it has changed a lot. 
>> Koreans used to eat the traditional food but it has changed a lot. 
Many people love eating western food. 
>> CORRECT!
These changes cause some health problem like diabites, obesity and diseases related with stomach.
>> These changes cause some health problem like diabetes, obesity, and diseases related with the stomach. 
Natually, people are interested in the nutrients what they have. 
>> Natually, people are interested in the nutrients of what these food have. 
We know less salty and sugar food help maintain healthy body, but it is not usually delicious. 
>> CORRECT!
Although, it is important to know what to eat, I would have more delicious food instead of healthy food.
>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118062 Writing Task(Apr 5th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 300
118061 Homework ÀÓ*ÃÑ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 1
118060 My favorite video games ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 246
118059 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 1
118058 What food do you try to avoid nowadays? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 1
118057 Do you think doctors are responsible in educating their patients... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 2
118056 Did you enjoy your time as a student? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 430
118055 4/6 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 177
118054 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 127
118053 What\'s the best thing about your parents? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 380
118052 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 1
118051 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 3
118050 Why people do the cyberbullying ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 2
118049 HOMEWORK ¹è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 281
118048 Use each word in a sentence. ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 136
118047 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 181
118046 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 1
118045 Where is the most amazing place you have been? Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 187
118044 The Social Norms ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 2
118043 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 117

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04