¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

In your opinion, what are the possible problems that your country might face with the increasing num

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-06-27 715

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It is common that seniors receive more salary than juniors due to the experiences and devotion at their company in my country. We thought that professionalizm can't lenrn in a short time and seniors deserve to be treated well than juniors. However, working environment has changed a lot, juniors have spoken up their voices, they don't want to admit seniors whose perfomance are worse and they want treat employees according to the personal abilities. Owners would like to reduce the labor costs because it is the easiest way to get more profits. Many people who are over 40s are worried about their retirement age. Many employers suggest managers, directors and staffs who are over 50s to retire earlier than expected ages. If employees agree to retire early, companies guarantee give high amount of severance pay. Low birth rate is also related with economic problem and the value of life has changed. People wnat to enjoy their life without any finance burden.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

It is common that seniors receive more salary than juniors due to the experiences and devotion at their company in my country. 
>> CORRECT!
We thought that professionalizm can't lenrn in a short time and seniors deserve to be treated well than juniors. 
>> We thought that professionalism can't be learned in a short time, and seniors deserve to be treated well than juniors. 
However, working environment has changed a lot, juniors have spoken up their voices, they don't want to admit seniors whose perfomance are worse and they want treat employees according to the personal abilities. 
>> However, working environment has changed a lot, juniors have spoken up and raised their voices, they don't want to admit seniors whose perfomances are worse, and they want to treat employees according to the personal abilities. 
Owners would like to reduce the labor costs because it is the easiest way to get more profits. 
>> CORRECT!
Many people who are over 40s are worried about their retirement age. 
>> CORRECT!
Many employers suggest managers, directors and staffs who are over 50s to retire earlier than expected ages. 
>> Many employers suggest managers, directors and staffs who are over 50s to retire earlier than expected. 
If employees agree to retire early, companies guarantee give high amount of severance pay. 
>> CORRECT!
Low birth rate is also related with economic problem and the value of life has changed. 
>> Low birth rate is also related with this economic problem and the value of life has changed. 
People wnat to enjoy their life without any finance burden.
>> People want to enjoy their life without any financial burden.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122202 Even though you may have been terrified by a particular ride,... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1245
122201 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1743
122200 Describe your dream house in a few sentences. ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1633
122199 Coffee shop ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1
122198 Are you happy with a two-day weekend or should it be three days?... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1211
122197 Use the following phrases in creative sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1132
122196 What activities do you enjoy doing on your free time? Le* ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 2076
122195 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1
122194 A book Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 2
122193 Which room in your home do you spend the most time in? Please... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1186
122192 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1638
122191 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1
122190 Which greeting kind of annoys you? ¾È*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1556
122189 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1298
122188 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1
122187 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1424
122186 Caleb\'s Homework for September 05. ±Ç*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1456
122185 bad person ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1713
122184 Does any particular food bring back any special memories for you? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1440
122183 Homework: Create simple sentences using the following words ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1196

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04