¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think it is better to have children when you are older or younger?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-06-24 638

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I got married when I was 31 years old and had my son next year after marriage. I have a son and a daughter who are 11 and 8 years old respectively. They will gratuate school when I reach about 60 years old which would be hard to do physical exercise and might have health problem. If I had my children in my 20th, I would have more chance to travel many countries and enjoy my life by doing a lot of activities because I will still have a job, so I don't need to worry about money. Many people don't want to get married. Among the people who got married don't want to spend their time to bring up their children, We used to get marrid in early 20th in 1960s to 1970s but couples would like to get married as late as possible because the value of life has changed. The low birth rate is the most serious problem these days. It cause a lot of social problem such as the national pension, health insurance and comflicts between young and old people. To solve these problem, government has to support

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


I got married when I was 31 years old and had my son next year after marriage. 
>> I got married when I was 31 years old and had my son the next year after marriage. 
I have a son and a daughter who are 11 and 8 years old respectively. 
>> CORRECT!
They will gratuate school when I reach about 60 years old which would be hard to do physical exercise and might have health problem. 
>> They will graduate school when I reach about 60 years old, the age which would be hard to do physical exercise and might have health problems. 
If I had my children in my 20th, I would have more chance to travel many countries and enjoy my life by doing a lot of activities because I will still have a job, so I don't need to worry about money. 
>> If I had my children in my 20's, I would have more chance to travel many countries and enjoy my life by doing a lot of activities because I will still have a job, so I don't need to worry about money. 
Many people don't want to get married. 
>> CORRECT!
Among the people who got married don't want to spend their time to bring up their children, 
>> Among the people who got married don't want to spend their time to bring up their children.
We used to get marrid in early 20th in 1960s to 1970s but couples would like to get married as late as possible because the value of life has changed. 
>> We used to get married at the age of 20 in 1960s to 1970s but couples would like to get married as late as possible because the value of life has changed. 
The low birth rate is the most serious problem these days. 
>> CORRECT!
It cause a lot of social problem such as the national pension, health insurance and comflicts between young and old people. 
>> It causes a lot of social problems such as the national pension, health insurance, and conflicts between young and old people. 
To solve these problem, government has to support
>> To solve these problem, the government has to give support to these people.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124719 2023-01-09-Newsparer À±*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-09 0
124718 I prefer.... ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-09 955
124717 4.Jan.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-09 1
124716 1/9 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-01-09 3
124715 How often do you read books? And what was the last book you read... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-09 3
124714 Adult with job need to pay the rent ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-09 1012
124713 What is the best way to achieve your goals? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-09 1
124712 What role does coffee play in your life? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-09 1
124711 Does coffee affect your appetite? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-09 1
124710 What do you think happens when you overdose on coffee? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-08 1
124709 Can you think of some dangerous chores that you can\'t do? ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-01-08 746
124708 What is the best way to help a friend or relative who is an... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-08 747
124707 Are violent video games bad? Why or why not? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-08 802
124706 Do you think people are healthier today than 50 years ago? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-08 1
124705 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-08 5
124704 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-08 4
124703 What animal is the best pet to have? ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-08 2
124702 How is a mistake different from an error? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-08 3
124701 What is the biggest change most people experience in their... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-07 929
124700 How can we prevent accidents caused by DUIs (Driving Under... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-07 818

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04