¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think it is better to have children when you are older or younger?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-06-24 750

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I got married when I was 31 years old and had my son next year after marriage. I have a son and a daughter who are 11 and 8 years old respectively. They will gratuate school when I reach about 60 years old which would be hard to do physical exercise and might have health problem. If I had my children in my 20th, I would have more chance to travel many countries and enjoy my life by doing a lot of activities because I will still have a job, so I don't need to worry about money. Many people don't want to get married. Among the people who got married don't want to spend their time to bring up their children, We used to get marrid in early 20th in 1960s to 1970s but couples would like to get married as late as possible because the value of life has changed. The low birth rate is the most serious problem these days. It cause a lot of social problem such as the national pension, health insurance and comflicts between young and old people. To solve these problem, government has to support

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


I got married when I was 31 years old and had my son next year after marriage. 
>> I got married when I was 31 years old and had my son the next year after marriage. 
I have a son and a daughter who are 11 and 8 years old respectively. 
>> CORRECT!
They will gratuate school when I reach about 60 years old which would be hard to do physical exercise and might have health problem. 
>> They will graduate school when I reach about 60 years old, the age which would be hard to do physical exercise and might have health problems. 
If I had my children in my 20th, I would have more chance to travel many countries and enjoy my life by doing a lot of activities because I will still have a job, so I don't need to worry about money. 
>> If I had my children in my 20's, I would have more chance to travel many countries and enjoy my life by doing a lot of activities because I will still have a job, so I don't need to worry about money. 
Many people don't want to get married. 
>> CORRECT!
Among the people who got married don't want to spend their time to bring up their children, 
>> Among the people who got married don't want to spend their time to bring up their children.
We used to get marrid in early 20th in 1960s to 1970s but couples would like to get married as late as possible because the value of life has changed. 
>> We used to get married at the age of 20 in 1960s to 1970s but couples would like to get married as late as possible because the value of life has changed. 
The low birth rate is the most serious problem these days. 
>> CORRECT!
It cause a lot of social problem such as the national pension, health insurance and comflicts between young and old people. 
>> It causes a lot of social problems such as the national pension, health insurance, and conflicts between young and old people. 
To solve these problem, government has to support
>> To solve these problem, the government has to give support to these people.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126936 Is taking a risk part of creativity? Why? Give an example. ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 5
126935 Countries where I have traveled to. ÀÌ*¿õ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 4
126934 Hw ÃÖ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 0
126933 Hw ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 2
126932 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 0
126931 What is your favorite color? Why? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 0
126930 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 0
126929 Monday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 1523
126928 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 1714
126927 3.27 homework ±Ç*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 1330
126926 3.27 Homework ¹Ú*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 1262
126925 3/22 ¼­*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 0
126924 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 1
126923 3/27 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 983
126922 hoesik ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 1341
126921 The embarrassing moment ¹é*¾ð ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 2
126920 Golf ±Ç*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 3
126919 1. South Korea 2. country ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 0
126918 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 1562
126917 Thomas Carlyle ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-27 1996

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04