¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think it is better to have children when you are older or younger?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-06-24 385

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I got married when I was 31 years old and had my son next year after marriage. I have a son and a daughter who are 11 and 8 years old respectively. They will gratuate school when I reach about 60 years old which would be hard to do physical exercise and might have health problem. If I had my children in my 20th, I would have more chance to travel many countries and enjoy my life by doing a lot of activities because I will still have a job, so I don't need to worry about money. Many people don't want to get married. Among the people who got married don't want to spend their time to bring up their children, We used to get marrid in early 20th in 1960s to 1970s but couples would like to get married as late as possible because the value of life has changed. The low birth rate is the most serious problem these days. It cause a lot of social problem such as the national pension, health insurance and comflicts between young and old people. To solve these problem, government has to support

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


I got married when I was 31 years old and had my son next year after marriage. 
>> I got married when I was 31 years old and had my son the next year after marriage. 
I have a son and a daughter who are 11 and 8 years old respectively. 
>> CORRECT!
They will gratuate school when I reach about 60 years old which would be hard to do physical exercise and might have health problem. 
>> They will graduate school when I reach about 60 years old, the age which would be hard to do physical exercise and might have health problems. 
If I had my children in my 20th, I would have more chance to travel many countries and enjoy my life by doing a lot of activities because I will still have a job, so I don't need to worry about money. 
>> If I had my children in my 20's, I would have more chance to travel many countries and enjoy my life by doing a lot of activities because I will still have a job, so I don't need to worry about money. 
Many people don't want to get married. 
>> CORRECT!
Among the people who got married don't want to spend their time to bring up their children, 
>> Among the people who got married don't want to spend their time to bring up their children.
We used to get marrid in early 20th in 1960s to 1970s but couples would like to get married as late as possible because the value of life has changed. 
>> We used to get married at the age of 20 in 1960s to 1970s but couples would like to get married as late as possible because the value of life has changed. 
The low birth rate is the most serious problem these days. 
>> CORRECT!
It cause a lot of social problem such as the national pension, health insurance and comflicts between young and old people. 
>> It causes a lot of social problems such as the national pension, health insurance, and conflicts between young and old people. 
To solve these problem, government has to support
>> To solve these problem, the government has to give support to these people.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119057 Machines that makes our lives easier ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 65
119056 5/16 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 58
119055 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 87
119054 In your opinion, what do you think is the most terrible disease? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 80
119053 Homework(2) ±è*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 2
119052 Homework(1) ±è*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 2
119051 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 0
119050 Do you think foreign language study should be required? Why or... ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 166
119049 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 2
119048 How do you say \'no\' to someone who asks you out politely? ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 70
119047 What\'s the greatest toy ever invented? And why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 93
119046 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 53
119045 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 73
119044 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 68
119043 Which machines do you think makes our life easier? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 58
119042 In your opinion, why is it important to constantly research on... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 113
119041 If you had to lose one of your senses(sight, smell, hearing,... ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 2
119040 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 84
119039 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 0
119038 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04