¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think it is better to have children when you are older or younger?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-06-24 456

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I got married when I was 31 years old and had my son next year after marriage. I have a son and a daughter who are 11 and 8 years old respectively. They will gratuate school when I reach about 60 years old which would be hard to do physical exercise and might have health problem. If I had my children in my 20th, I would have more chance to travel many countries and enjoy my life by doing a lot of activities because I will still have a job, so I don't need to worry about money. Many people don't want to get married. Among the people who got married don't want to spend their time to bring up their children, We used to get marrid in early 20th in 1960s to 1970s but couples would like to get married as late as possible because the value of life has changed. The low birth rate is the most serious problem these days. It cause a lot of social problem such as the national pension, health insurance and comflicts between young and old people. To solve these problem, government has to support

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


I got married when I was 31 years old and had my son next year after marriage. 
>> I got married when I was 31 years old and had my son the next year after marriage. 
I have a son and a daughter who are 11 and 8 years old respectively. 
>> CORRECT!
They will gratuate school when I reach about 60 years old which would be hard to do physical exercise and might have health problem. 
>> They will graduate school when I reach about 60 years old, the age which would be hard to do physical exercise and might have health problems. 
If I had my children in my 20th, I would have more chance to travel many countries and enjoy my life by doing a lot of activities because I will still have a job, so I don't need to worry about money. 
>> If I had my children in my 20's, I would have more chance to travel many countries and enjoy my life by doing a lot of activities because I will still have a job, so I don't need to worry about money. 
Many people don't want to get married. 
>> CORRECT!
Among the people who got married don't want to spend their time to bring up their children, 
>> Among the people who got married don't want to spend their time to bring up their children.
We used to get marrid in early 20th in 1960s to 1970s but couples would like to get married as late as possible because the value of life has changed. 
>> We used to get married at the age of 20 in 1960s to 1970s but couples would like to get married as late as possible because the value of life has changed. 
The low birth rate is the most serious problem these days. 
>> CORRECT!
It cause a lot of social problem such as the national pension, health insurance and comflicts between young and old people. 
>> It causes a lot of social problems such as the national pension, health insurance, and conflicts between young and old people. 
To solve these problem, government has to support
>> To solve these problem, the government has to give support to these people.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122614 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 2
122613 How did you choose to buy your car? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 2
122612 Is competition good for people? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 1924
122611 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 1144
122610 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 1969
122609 What happy memories do you have of your birthday parties? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 1831
122608 Do you want to be a queen? Why or why not? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 1440
122607 To handle variables in the future ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 0
122606 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 0
122605 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 1
122604 What do you really hate having to do in your free time? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 2328
122603 Monday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 1553
122602 Homework ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 1501
122601 When do you realize that your patience is wearing thin? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 2171
122600 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 1710
122599 Hi Gemma ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 4
122598 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 1551
122597 The happening ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 2
122596 Hi Mayleen ±è*¿Ï ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 1824
122595 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04