¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think is the best country in the world and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¿¬
2022-06-23 625

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think Canada is the best country in the world.
Frankly I don't know each world well.
With my short knowledge, If someone immgrates to Canada.
When some mothers sign up for the university or the collage, their kids can take classes in public school for free.
This policy can lead up many immigrants to come to Canada.
Then many working people can pay taxes to their country.
Therefore both Canadians and immigants are good for life.
So I think Canada is good country.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Gina!  

I would love to live in that country as well. They are well disciplined and the economy is good there. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I think Canada is the best country in the world.
>> CORRECT

Frankly I don't know each world well.
>> Frankly I don't know each countries very well. 

With my short knowledge, If someone immgrates to Canada.
>> With my short knowledge, some people migrate to Canada. 

When some mothers sign up for the university or the collage, their kids can take classes in public school for free.
>> When mothers sign up for the university or the collage of their kids, they usually pick the public ones so that it's free. 

This policy can lead up many immigrants to come to Canada.
>> CORRECT

Then many working people can pay taxes to their country.
>> Many working people pay taxes to their country. 

Therefore both Canadians and immigants are good for life.
>> Therefore, both Canadians and immigrants are good for life.

So I think Canada is good country.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121504 What do you love doing with your relatives? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1107
121503 Make decision Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1
121502 8/10 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 682
121501 Why is helping others important? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 583
121500 Do you prefer relaxing weekends doing nothing or active ones? /... ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 1164
121499 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 814
121498 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 720
121497 When I wished the rain would stop Á¶*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 1009
121496 If you could change one thing in the world, what would it be? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 761
121495 What is the best way to enjoy Chuseok without spending too much? ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 817
121494 Trading Time for Money ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 1219
121493 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 595
121492 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 706
121491 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 4
121490 What comes to mind whenever you hear the word \'YOUNG\'? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 695
121489 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 514
121488 What is the strangest food you have ever tried? Describe it for... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 548
121487 Why is swimming your favorite sport? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 587
121486 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 709
121485 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 745

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04