¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you agree that dogs are man\'s best friend? Explain your thought.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*
2022-06-22 490

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

dog is strange animal. dog is different animal. have you thought why only dogs are so friendly with human? well, there is a research explains why dogs are friendly. it says some wild woolf-ish dogs evolved with human for a long times ago. researchers dispute the time however, people assume that it happened 33,000 years ago. we shared our life with this species more than any other animals. some say why dog started live with human is they had a different gene that feel no fear of human. maybe it engraved in their gene, they believed that human are efficient to have a habitat, shelter, protection, and most likely food.
now it has totally changed story however it has the same way that dog is still be with human.
we share our life with dogs by love. like a family members. dogs evolved to be domestic animal by human hands and also human's life changed. we don't need them to hunt, to protect human. people want to share the life with dogs as it always was.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there Lim!
Thank you for your response in your homework. I gave some simple corrections on yor composition but there is nothing to worry about. Also, be mindful of your CAPITALIZATION when you start a new sentence. That's it, in general. Well done!
Have a great day always!
Aki~
dog is strange animal. 
>>> A dog is strange animal. 
dog is different animal.
>>> A dog is a different animal.
OR >>> A dog is a strange and different animal (Put them as one sentence)
have you thought why only dogs are so friendly with human? 
>>> Have you thought about why only dogs are so friendly to humans? 
well, there is a research explains why dogs are friendly. 
>>> Well, there is research that explains why dogs are friendly.
it says some wild woolf-ish dogs evolved with human for a long times ago. 
>>> It says some wild Woolf-ish dogs evolved with humans a long time ago. 
researchers dispute the time however, people assume that it happened 33,000 years ago. 
>>> Researchers dispute the time however, people assume that it happened 33,000 years ago. 
We shared our life with this species more than any other animal. 
>>> CORRECT!
some say why dog started live with human is they had a different gene that feel no fear of human. 
>>> Some say why dogs started to live with humans is they had a different gene that feels no fear of humans. 
maybe it engraved in their gene, they believed that human are efficient to have a habitat, shelter, protection, and most likely food.
>> Maybe it is engraved in their gene, they believed that humans are efficient to have a habitat, shelter, protection, and most likely food.
now it has totally changed story however it has the same way that dog is still be with human.
>>> Now it has totally changed the story however it has the same way that dog is still with the human.
we share our life with dogs by love. like a family members. 
>>> Now it has totally changed the story however it has the same way that dog is still with the human.
we share our lives with dogs by love. like family members. 
dogs evolved to be domestic animal by human hands and also human's life changed. 
>>> dogs evolved to be domestic animals by human hands and also human life changed. 
We don't need them to hunt, to protect humans. people want to share their life with dogs as it always was.
>>We don't need them to hunt, to protect humans. people want to share their life with dogs as it always was.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119546 homework ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 69
119545 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 57
119544 homework ³²*¸¸ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 72
119543 About money ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 55
119542 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 128
119541 Why is getting along with people important? answer in a few... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 106
119540 Writing Essay(Jun 1st, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 136
119539 Why are young people addicted and overspending in the digital... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 142
119538 Do you believe that Korean culture has a big effect on the world? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 86
119537 When makes you happy? ¿ø*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 114
119536 What is your opinion about ¡°edu-sitters¡±? Do you think they... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 64
119535 What makes you very active physically every day? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 3
119534 What is one food you can\'t live without? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 91
119533 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 75
119532 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 86
119531 Homework ÇÏ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 86
119530 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 1
119529 Would you agree that death penalty should be implemented? Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 48
119528 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 1
119527 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-02 110

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04