¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you agree that dogs are man\'s best friend? Explain your thought.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*
2022-06-22 574

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

dog is strange animal. dog is different animal. have you thought why only dogs are so friendly with human? well, there is a research explains why dogs are friendly. it says some wild woolf-ish dogs evolved with human for a long times ago. researchers dispute the time however, people assume that it happened 33,000 years ago. we shared our life with this species more than any other animals. some say why dog started live with human is they had a different gene that feel no fear of human. maybe it engraved in their gene, they believed that human are efficient to have a habitat, shelter, protection, and most likely food.
now it has totally changed story however it has the same way that dog is still be with human.
we share our life with dogs by love. like a family members. dogs evolved to be domestic animal by human hands and also human's life changed. we don't need them to hunt, to protect human. people want to share the life with dogs as it always was.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there Lim!
Thank you for your response in your homework. I gave some simple corrections on yor composition but there is nothing to worry about. Also, be mindful of your CAPITALIZATION when you start a new sentence. That's it, in general. Well done!
Have a great day always!
Aki~
dog is strange animal. 
>>> A dog is strange animal. 
dog is different animal.
>>> A dog is a different animal.
OR >>> A dog is a strange and different animal (Put them as one sentence)
have you thought why only dogs are so friendly with human? 
>>> Have you thought about why only dogs are so friendly to humans? 
well, there is a research explains why dogs are friendly. 
>>> Well, there is research that explains why dogs are friendly.
it says some wild woolf-ish dogs evolved with human for a long times ago. 
>>> It says some wild Woolf-ish dogs evolved with humans a long time ago. 
researchers dispute the time however, people assume that it happened 33,000 years ago. 
>>> Researchers dispute the time however, people assume that it happened 33,000 years ago. 
We shared our life with this species more than any other animal. 
>>> CORRECT!
some say why dog started live with human is they had a different gene that feel no fear of human. 
>>> Some say why dogs started to live with humans is they had a different gene that feels no fear of humans. 
maybe it engraved in their gene, they believed that human are efficient to have a habitat, shelter, protection, and most likely food.
>> Maybe it is engraved in their gene, they believed that humans are efficient to have a habitat, shelter, protection, and most likely food.
now it has totally changed story however it has the same way that dog is still be with human.
>>> Now it has totally changed the story however it has the same way that dog is still with the human.
we share our life with dogs by love. like a family members. 
>>> Now it has totally changed the story however it has the same way that dog is still with the human.
we share our lives with dogs by love. like family members. 
dogs evolved to be domestic animal by human hands and also human's life changed. 
>>> dogs evolved to be domestic animals by human hands and also human life changed. 
We don't need them to hunt, to protect humans. people want to share their life with dogs as it always was.
>>We don't need them to hunt, to protect humans. people want to share their life with dogs as it always was.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121644 Could liking chocolate be considered a \"vice\"? Why or why not? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-17 3
121643 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-17 2
121642 16.08.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-17 2
121641 Describe a quality that you got from your parents ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-17 2
121640 How do you feel about Korean language becoming popular around... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-17 0
121639 What can be one of the biggest problems that married life could... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-08-17 2
121638 Do you think sports stars have the best life? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-08-17 664
121637 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-16 924
121636 Where is your favorite place to read? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-16 739
121635 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-16 3
121634 My best way for recess ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-16 1
121633 What makes you healthy? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-16 975
121632 According to some civic groups, the restrictions may further... ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-16 2
121631 H ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-16 1
121630 What are the ingredients of your favorite food and how often do... ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-16 1128
121629 What does music mean to you? ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-16 1015
121628 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-16 1
121627 Do you eat healthy food? / What healthy food do you want to eat? ÃÖ*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-16 1100
121626 What was the most difficult experience you faced in your life?... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-08-16 622
121625 How are birthdays celebrated in your country? How would you want... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-16 937

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04