¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think getting old is a good thing or a bad thing? Explain your answer.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-06-21 435

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think getting old is just a natural thing that we need to accept.
If we don't get old, then we need to live forever even tough out love ones are dead.
And if we live forever, then it will be so boring and we will lose the meaning of our lives.
Because of these reasons, I think getting old is just a natural thing that we have to accept.
So I will get old even tough I have a chance to live forever without getting old.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John!  

Getting old is the only inevitable thing in this world. It's irreversible. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I think getting old is just a natural thing that we need to accept.
>>CORRECT

If we don't get old, then we need to live forever even tough out love ones are dead.
>> If we don't get old, then we need to live forever even though our loved ones are already dead. 

And if we live forever, then it will be so boring and we will lose the meaning of our lives.
>>CORRECT

Because of these reasons, I think getting old is just a natural thing that we have to accept.
>>CORRECT

So I will get old even tough I have a chance to live forever without getting old.
> > CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119786 Are actors and professional athletes paid too much? Why or why... ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-06-12 1
119785 What do you think would South Korea be like if it still has... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-06-11 121
119784 What do you like most about your colleagues at work? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-11 155
119783 What can be a good career when you are 60 years old and above?... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-11 141
119782 6.10 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-06-11 111
119781 About the ¡®old age¡¯. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 143
119780 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 148
119779 6/10 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 115
119778 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 144
119777 Discuss the advantages and the disadvantages of studying abroad ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 0
119776 . ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 107
119775 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 88
119774 homework ¿ø*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 157
119773 How long do you want to live? Please discuss your answer. ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 152
119772 What is the strangest food you¡¯ve seen or eaten while on... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 135
119771 How long do I want to live ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 173
119770 What is the most difficult thing about learning English? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 127
119769 If aliens visited your country, what might surprise them? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 0
119768 Most dangerous experience ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 79
119767 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 103

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04