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Which one is more comfortable: living in the urban areas or living in the rural areas/ suburbs? Why

작성자: 황*하
2022-06-21 303

회원님의 영작문

I think that it depends on the age. Young people want to live in metropolitan area because they can access any faciality easily by walk, there are more opportunity to get a job and it gives a chance to live in clean and developed houses. Actually, I was born in Paju, northern part of Korea, rural area and would like to leave my home town because there weren't useful facilities for citizen, there were few schools and various stores. In addition, I wanted to study in more advanced cities becaues it gave students enter the best university. However, my dream has changed since I was living in Seoul. I realized that I don't like crowded places, air pollution and traffic in the city. Morever, it takes a lot of time to leave Seoul by car when I take a trip to other cities due to traffic jam. If I can get a job near the beach or golf course, I would move out to rural area.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

I think that it depends on the age. 
>> CORRECT!
Young people want to live in metropolitan area because they can access any faciality easily by walk, there are more opportunity to get a job and it gives a chance to live in clean and developed houses. 
>> Young people want to live in metropolitan areas because they can access any facility easily by walking, there are more opportunities to get a job, and it gives a chance to live in clean and developed houses. 
Actually, I was born in Paju, northern part of Korea, rural area and would like to leave my home town because there weren't useful facilities for citizen, there were few schools and various stores. 
>> Actually, I was born in Paju, northern part of Korea, rural area and would like to leave my hometown because there weren't any useful facilities for citizens, there were a few schools and various stores. 
In addition, I wanted to study in more advanced cities becaues it gave students enter the best university. 
>> In addition, I wanted to study in more advanced cities because it gave students enter the best university. 
However, my dream has changed since I was living in Seoul. 
>> CORRECT!
I realized that I don't like crowded places, air pollution and traffic in the city. 
>> CORRECT!
Morever, it takes a lot of time to leave Seoul by car when I take a trip to other cities due to traffic jam. 
>> CORRECT!
If I can get a job near the beach or golf course, I would move out to rural area.
>> CORRECT!
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