¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

favorite place in my city

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¿µ
2022-06-20 846

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My favorite place in my city is my home! because i am lazy to go out so i almost stay at home. while i am home i can study,play phone,eat some foods etc, i can do many kinds of things. and these days going out is little bit dangerous because of pandemic. so i think my favorite place in my city is my home.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Chloe!  

Yes, there is no place like home. We can be ourselves when we are at our house. We are also be surrounded by that people that we love. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon

My favorite place in my city is my home! because i am lazy to go out so i almost stay at home. 
>> My favorite place in my city is my home because I am lazy to go out. I usually just stay at home.. 

while i am home i can study,play phone,eat some foods etc, i can do many kinds of things. 
>> When I am home, I can play, study, use my phone and eat some food. I can do many things here. 

and these days going out is little bit dangerous because of pandemic. so i think my favorite place in my city is my home.
>> And these days, going out is a little bit dangerous because of the pandemic so I think that my favorite place in my city is my home. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120964 What would the world be like without chocolate? ÃÖ*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 373
120963 invite ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 1
120962 Homework for 07.21.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 3
120961 Do you think parents nowadays are different from parents in the... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 555
120960 What\'s the most fun you\'ve had while studying? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 566
120959 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 436
120958 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 383
120957 Can you concentrate on other things when you are listening to... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 0
120956 Which one do you think is better, owning your home or renting a... ¹é*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 356
120955 Homework ÀÌ*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 2
120954 please check my sentence. ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 693
120953 Do they deserve the same level of treatment that we offer to... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 722
120952 Foregin workers ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 1800
120951 homework Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 534
120950 When you treat yourself with food, what do you eat? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 2
120949 Movie Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 3
120948 How much do you care about the clothes you wear? Who do you... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 515
120947 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 1
120946 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 628
120945 Homework for 07.20.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 4

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04