¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Is it important to have hobbies? Why/why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*±â
2022-06-14 439

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that I should to have hobbies, because the hobby can give me some energy and health of both body and spirit.
Also, many people can get stress to work and the stress will give them some bad efects. The hobby can help to release stress.
So, I think that the hobby is necessary to ours.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Simon. Thank you for sending me your homework. I agree with you that a hobby is important to people. We should continue doing what we love. ~T. Lyn
I think that I should to have hobbies, because the hobby can give me some energy and health of both body and spirit.
>>I think that I should have hobbies because doing activities can give me some energy and health for both my body and spirit.
Also, many people can get stress to work and the stress will give them some bad efects. 
>>Also, many people are stressed because of working and that stress will give them some bad effects.
The hobby can help to release stress.
>>Hobby helps and allows us to release stress.
So, I think that hobby is necessary to ours.
>>Therefore, I think that hobby is necessary for us.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120380 What is one mistake you\'ve done that you don\'t want to happen... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-07-02 575
120379 What presents when I give in parents day to parents. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-07-02 657
120378 What I put on my hand ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-07-02 409
120377 What can I do in amusement park. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-07-02 378
120376 Why do you think research and development are important? How can... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-02 795
120375 homework and advice ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-02 624
120374 7/1 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 354
120373 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 558
120372 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 542
120371 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 0
120370 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 880
120369 Which drama or movie touched you the most? Why? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 753
120368 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 513
120367 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 273
120366 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 709
120365 My city ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 4
120364 What comes into your head when you hear the word \"money\"? How... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 522
120363 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 0
120362 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 2
120361 Power English homework : Writing what I mostly do in my weekends. ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-07-01 387

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04