¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

It men feel more emotional, do you think that the world will be more balanced?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÇÑ*¼ö
2022-06-14 398

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If men feel more emotional, the world more balanced. men don't like to have sympathy, Their best value is different with women. That is achievement, in another words, taking something. They don't focus the process. So, if they care the process with emotion & sympathy, The world's direction will be changed.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Jisu!

I couln't agree more with you. As mentioned in class, both genders have their respective traits. If we learn to become the other, then, we can master coexisting with each other.

Thank you for the brilliance in your answer. Take note that the underlined or underscored letters, words, or phrases are suggestions to enhance your sentences. Kindly go over them when you have the time to do so.

See you again soon for more meaningful discussions.

-T. Donna =)

If men feel more emotional, the world more balanced. 
>>  If men feel more emotional, the world would be more balanced. 

men don't like to have sympathy, Their best value is different with women. 
>> Men don't like to have sympathy since their best value is different with women. 

That is achievement, in another words, taking something. 
>> Correct!
Or: That is by achievements, in others words, (taking/ possessing) something.

They don't focus the process. 
>> They don't focus on the process.

So, if they care the process with emotion & sympathy, The world's direction will be changed.
>>  So, if they care about the process with emotion & sympathy, the world's direction will be changed.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119150 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 90
119149 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 88
119148 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 71
119147 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 64
119146 5.18 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 90
119145 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 79
119144 What is Korea\'s best tourist attraction? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 3
119143 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 1
119142 My lifetime dream. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 163
119141 Driving under influence of alcohol is a big problem these days.... ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 127
119140 Why I like meeting new people. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 101
119139 Are you worried about your future? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 114
119138 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-18 54
119137 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-18 72
119136 Writing Task(May 17th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-05-18 82
119135 5/18 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-18 80
119134 What motivates you in wanting to make books? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-18 79
119133 My study skills. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-18 124
119132 How could art be appreciated and enjoyed by more people? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-18 102
119131 I prefer to eat at home ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-18 12

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04