¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is your most dangerous experience in life?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*
2022-06-10 495

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

One thing popped up when I was in Australia.
I went to a river to cross for three days. My friends and I rented a canoe and packed some camp equipment. At the river, human hands made nothing, and we just held a map that someone drew. We ought to freely go canoeing for 3days without a guide, GPS, navigation system or motor boat but the silly map.
The weather was so lovely and clear. Well, it was scorching, but I had already got used to the weather there. And the river had quite enough current because it was at the end of the wet season. So it rained a lot for the past few months, yet draught. It was fine for canoeing.
It happened at the very beginning, about 30mins after we left the bank.
But I was nervous. This was my first time canoeing on the vast river, especially for a few days, so I was quite a bit stupid at the beginning of the journey. I needed some more trials to start.
Well, however, the current never let me as I wanted to.

to be continued...

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Lim!  

I would love to hear the rest of it tomorrow. Hahaha!

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

One thing popped up when I was in Australia.
>> One thing that popped up in my mind and that is when I was in Australia. 

I went to a river to cross for three days. 
>> I crossed a river for 3 days. 

My friends and I rented a canoe and packed some camp equipment. 
>> CORRECT

At the river, human hands made nothing, and we just held a map that someone drew. 
>> There were no man made things there. We just held a map the someone drew. 

We ought to freely go canoeing for 3days without a guide, GPS, navigation system or motor boat but the silly map.
>> CORRECT

The weather was so lovely and clear. 
>> CORRECT

Well, it was scorching, but I had already got used to the weather there. 
>> CORRECT

And the river had quite enough current because it was at the end of the wet season. 
>> CORRECT

So it rained a lot for the past few months, yet draught.
>> It was raining for the past few months, yet it was still draught. 

It was fine for canoeing.
>> Everything was fine when we were canoeing. 

It happened at the very beginning, about 30mins after we left the bank.
>> CORRECT

But I was nervous. 
>> Although, I was nervous at that time. 

This was my first time canoeing on the vast river, especially for a few days, so I was quite a bit stupid at the beginning of the journey. 
>> CORRECT

I needed some more trials to start.
>> CORRECT

Well, however, the current never let me as I wanted to.
>> However, the current never let me have the control that I wanted to. 

to be continued.
>> To be continued. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119708 homework ¿ø*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 90
119707 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 3
119706 Do you think we will be able to cure cancer one day? What can we... ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 1
119705 About climate and weather ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 7
119704 What are some good points about social networking? What are some... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 110
119703 How important is farming in your country? And Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 96
119702 Do you think it is good to always ask for suggestions? Why or... ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 68
119701 home work ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 125
119700 What do you think is the best job in the world? Why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 105
119699 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 73
119698 homeworrk ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 115
119697 What is the best historical place there in South Korea and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 0
119696 What do you think is the best job in the world? Why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 0
119695 homework ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 87
119694 Do you prefer to go shopping or just browse? Why? 20220606... Le* ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 233
119693 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 387
119692 I always try to find a positive action plan that I can do in any... ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 184
119691 Soeun\'s Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 3
119690 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 102
119689 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04