¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think that you should change your eating habits? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-06-07 166

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't think that I should change my eating habits.
Because I'm eating well, and also I am eating many kinds of dishes that are beneficial to my body.
Even tough I hate some of vegetables, I am trying to eat those kinds of vegetables.
Because of these reasons, I don't think that I should change my eating habits.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John!  

That's good to hear!

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I don't think that I should change my eating habits.
>> CORRECT

Because I'm eating well, and also I am eating many kinds of dishes that are beneficial to my body.
>> It is because I am eating well and most of the food that I eat are beneficial to my body. 

Even tough I hate some of vegetables, I am trying to eat those kinds of vegetables.
> Even though I hate some vegetables, I still try to eat most of them. 

Because of these reasons, I don't think that I should change my eating habits.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119038 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 0
119037 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 0
119036 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 1
119035 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 85
119034 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 92
119033 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 1
119032 What is the most memorable birthday you\'ve ever had? Explain... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 68
119031 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 69
119030 bing bang theory 1 ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 107
119029 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 71
119028 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 1
119027 Famous ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 2
119026 Which is better, studying in a private school, public school or... ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 1
119025 Writing Task(May 13th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-05-15 73
119024 [Homework] What factor may result in the breakdown of a good... ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-15 4
119023 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-15 43
119022 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-15 47
119021 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-15 62
119020 Do you think blind dates are a good way to meet someone special?... ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-15 86
119019 What would you do if you had to travel to a country where its... ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-15 60

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04