¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think that you should change your eating habits? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-06-07 266

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't think that I should change my eating habits.
Because I'm eating well, and also I am eating many kinds of dishes that are beneficial to my body.
Even tough I hate some of vegetables, I am trying to eat those kinds of vegetables.
Because of these reasons, I don't think that I should change my eating habits.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John!  

That's good to hear!

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I don't think that I should change my eating habits.
>> CORRECT

Because I'm eating well, and also I am eating many kinds of dishes that are beneficial to my body.
>> It is because I am eating well and most of the food that I eat are beneficial to my body. 

Even tough I hate some of vegetables, I am trying to eat those kinds of vegetables.
> Even though I hate some vegetables, I still try to eat most of them. 

Because of these reasons, I don't think that I should change my eating habits.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121517 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 0
121516 Haunted house ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 3
121515 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 671
121514 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1276
121513 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 944
121512 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 2
121511 homework ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 2
121510 homework ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1
121509 life expectancy ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 657
121508 Should parents help their children set goals? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 2
121507 It seeme like a family birthday party. ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 980
121506 Describe a natural disaster that you have experienced in your... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 2
121505 How is elementary education system in America different with... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 2
121504 What do you love doing with your relatives? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1222
121503 Make decision Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1
121502 8/10 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 748
121501 Why is helping others important? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 639
121500 Do you prefer relaxing weekends doing nothing or active ones? /... ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 1222
121499 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 928
121498 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 778

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04