¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think men and women are equal? Share your answer in a few sentences.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÇÑ*¼ö
2022-06-03 172

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Men and Women's value is equal. but their charactor and system of thinking is different. And generally men's physical condition is better. especially women have a duration time of pregnant. obviously it is very import thing, but women in pregnant have to their fetus, so they can't care themselves. at the same time, men is different. they can ignore their women and fetus. they can enjoy their own life. I have a thought that's the reason men's social power is better than women.

Progress of pregnant is very important, but women's life is important, too. So, for happiness both of them, men have to cooperate.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Jisu!

I couldn't agree more with your overall viewpoints regarding men and women's role in outr society. Men are physically strong thus, they can care for women. In return, women should care for men and support them as they do their share of labor. Overtime, both of these genders built the world we live in today. Coexistence is a must.

Here on your homework answer, there are a few suggestions I made. First of all, as a gentle reminder, starting your sentence with a capital letter (A, B, C, D,...) marks the beginning of a new sentence. Moreover, for the rest of the other grammar suggestions, study all of your sentences below. Your strongest point here is your ideas- they were well founded and factual. Thus, well done for this homework!

Have a wonderful weekend!

-T. Donna =) 

Men and Women's value is equal. but their charactor and system of thinking is different. 
>> Men and Women's value is equal but their character and system of thinking are different. 

And generally men's physical condition is better. 
>> And generally, men's physical condition is better (stronger).

especially women have a duration time of pregnant. 
>> Especially, women have a duration time of pregnanancy.
Or: Women have a special duty for pregnancy.

obviously it is very import thing, but women in pregnant have to their fetus, so they can't care themselves. 
>> Obviously it is a very import thing, but pregnant women have their fetus, so they can't care themselves well. 
>> Obviously, it is a very import thing, but pregnant women have to take care of themselves. 

at the same time, men is different. 
>> At the same time, men are different. 

they can ignore their women and fetus. 
>> They can ignore their women and the fetus. 
>> They may not necessarily be involved in caring for women and their babies.

they can enjoy their own life. 
>> They can enjoy their own lives. 

I have a thought that's the reason men's social power is better than women.
>> I have a thought that these are the reason why men's social power is better than women.

Progress of pregnant is very important, but women's life is important, too. 
>> The progress of pregnancy is very important, but women's lives are important, too. 
Or: The progress of pregnancy is very important as well as women's lives. 

So, for happiness both of them, men have to cooperate.
>> So, for happiness, both of them, men and women have to cooperate.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117861 Tell me about a recent news you\'ve read or heard about. ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 308
117860 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 508
117859 Do you like to eat fruits? What\'s your favorite one and why? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 0
117858 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 418
117857 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 3
117856 What do you think is the best TV show and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 493
117855 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 542
117854 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 1
117853 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 260
117852 Things I collect. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 482
117851 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 640
117850 Do you prefer playing or watching sports? Why? ¼º*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 533
117849 Home work ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 900
117848 Baby Shark ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 753
117847 How would you describe your personality? Are you happy with your... ¼º*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 355
117846 What are your favorite desserts? And why? ¼º*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 657
117845 Tell me about the first time you went to the movie theater? ¼º*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 653
117844 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 350
117843 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 3
117842 homework ¹Ú*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 613

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04