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영작교정 게시판

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서비스 입니다.

How was your childhood in your time?

작성자: 황*하
2022-05-17 90

회원님의 영작문

I was born in rural area which is northern part of Kyeonggi provience. My father was a taxi driver which is nice job to make money. My family didn't have any financial problem until my father had a car accident. We went out for dinner once a month, took a trip frenquently and had a plan to buy own house. But we spent a lot of money for medical expenses due to traffic accident. My father was admitted in the hospital for about a year and needed to pay huge money. The doctor told my mother that he was under the serious condition that might lost his life. Fortunately, he overcame from the injury. However, my family couldn't find proper house due to small budget. We rented a small house next to the church which my family attended. The pastor might rent it alomost free for us. Sinece the accident, mom and father worked hard. They didn't have any time to spend with children so, my sister and I stayed at home lonely. I felt really scared to be there without parents. I remember that we cried a

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

I was born in rural area which is northern part of Kyeonggi provience. 
>> I was born in rural area which is northern part of Kyeonggi province. 
My father was a taxi driver which is nice job to make money. 
>> CORRECT!
My family didn't have any financial problem until my father had a car accident. 
>> CORRECT!
We went out for dinner once a month, took a trip frenquently and had a plan to buy own house.
>> CORRECT!
But we spent a lot of money for medical expenses due to traffic accident. 
>> But we spent a lot of money for medical expenses due to a road accident. 
My father was admitted in the hospital for about a year and needed to pay huge money. 
>> CORRECT!
OR >> My father was admitted in the hospital for about a year and needed to pay a large amount of money. 
The doctor told my mother that he was under the serious condition that might lost his life.
>> The doctor told my mother that he was under a serious condition that might lose his life.
 Fortunately, he overcame from the injury. 
>>  Fortunately, he recovered from the injury. 
However, my family couldn't find proper house due to small budget. 
>> However, my family couldn't find a proper house due to small budget. 
We rented a small house next to the church which my family attended. 
>> CORRECT!
The pastor might rent it alomost free for us. 
>> The pastor might rent it almost for free, for us. 
Sinece the accident, mom and father worked hard. 
>> Since the accident, my mom and dad worked hard. 
OR >> Since then, my parents worked hard.
They didn't have any time to spend with children so, my sister and I stayed at home lonely. 
>> CORRECT!
I felt really scared to be there without parents. 
>> CORRECT!
I remember that we cried a
>> I remember that we cried a lot without them around for a moment.
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