¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Which one do you think is better, living with relatives or living alone? Explain your answer.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-05-04 198

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, living alone is much better than living with relatives.
First, there are a lot of differences between me and my relatives.
There are sometimes conflicts of opinions between me and my family, and me and my relatives will do so.
And also I just want to live alone if I don't have my own family.
Because of these reasons, living alone is much better than living with relatives for me.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! 

Both has their pros and cons. It really depends on the person. Me, I prefer living alone because I like being independent.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon

In my opinion, living alone is much better than living with relatives.
>> CORRECT

First, there are a lot of differences between me and my relatives.
>> CORRECT

There are sometimes conflicts of opinions between me and my family, and me and my relatives will do so.
>> Sometimes there are conflicts of opinions between me and my family. 

And also I just want to live alone if I don't have my own family.
>> Also, I want to live along even if I don't have my own family yet. 

Because of these reasons, living alone is much better than living with relatives for me. 
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119782 6.10 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-06-11 301
119781 About the ¡®old age¡¯. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 326
119780 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 333
119779 6/10 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 293
119778 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 287
119777 Discuss the advantages and the disadvantages of studying abroad ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 0
119776 . ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 300
119775 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 213
119774 homework ¿ø*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 302
119773 How long do you want to live? Please discuss your answer. ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 343
119772 What is the strangest food you¡¯ve seen or eaten while on... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 271
119771 How long do I want to live ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 357
119770 What is the most difficult thing about learning English? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 307
119769 If aliens visited your country, what might surprise them? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 0
119768 Most dangerous experience ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 208
119767 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 259
119766 Home ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 0
119765 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 1
119764 What is your most dangerous experience in life? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 295
119763 Home ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04