¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Which one do you think is better, electronic books or traditional books, and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ý*Áø
2022-04-28 152

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think both of them are valuable by several reasons. However, if I have to choose just one, I think electronic books are better these days.
That¡¯s because it makes our lives more convenient.
First of all, we don¡¯t need to carry several books in person. We can read a lot of books through mobile phones or smart devices whenever and wherever we want. It¡¯s the biggest advantage for us these days. Besides, we don¡¯t need to go to the bookstores or library to buy it. We can get them easily by web searching on the internet.
However, although electronic books are very convenient, there is attraction only that traditional books give us. Not just for this reason, but for a lot of reasons we have to know the importance of traditional books as well.

1. Although I hate taking multivitamins, I have to bite the bullet by myself for my health.
2. If you don¡¯t want to bite the bullet, you would stop it.
3. I have been biting the bullet for my work.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Chloe! 

I prefer traditional books too because most of the facts there are accurate. 

PS: You are getting good in making your sentences :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon. 

I think both of them are valuable by several reasons. 
>>CORRECT

However, if I have to choose just one, I think electronic books are better these days.
>>CORRECT

That¡¯s because it makes our lives more convenient.
>> CORRECT

First of all, we don¡¯t need to carry several books in person. 
>> First of all, we don¡¯t need to carry several books on hand. 

We can read a lot of books through mobile phones or smart devices whenever and wherever we want. 
>> CORRECT

It¡¯s the biggest advantage for us these days. 
>> CORRECT

Besides, we don¡¯t need to go to the bookstores or library to buy it. 
>> CORRECT

We can get them easily by web searching on the internet.
>> CORRECT

However, although electronic books are very convenient, there is attraction only that traditional books give us. 
>> However, although electronic books are very convenient, there is the attraction the only traditional books give us. 

Not just for this reason, but for a lot of reasons we have to know the importance of traditional books as well.
>> CORRECT

1. Although I hate taking multivitamins, I have to bite the bullet by myself for my health.
>> CORRECT

2. If you don¡¯t want to bite the bullet, you would stop it.
>> 2.CORRECT

3. I have been biting the bullet for my work
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118374 Why I would not to be a pilot ±è*¼º ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-21 182
118373 What song would you like to dedicate to your parents and why? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 171
118372 Writing Task(Apr 19th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 105
118371 krowemoh 02/4 ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 79
118370 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 2
118369 I will read book the 1st. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 116
118368 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 3
118367 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 0
118366 Answer in complete sentences ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 99
118365 Right? ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 1
118364 What do you want to include in your ideal fitness program? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 100
118363 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 2
118362 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 74
118361 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 81
118360 If you could have one superpower, what would it be? Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 96
118359 What city do you think is the best in South Korea? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 75
118358 Does beauty affect one\'s success in life? Why do you think so? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 4
118357 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 58
118356 Borrow ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 1
118355 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 55

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04