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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What do you plan on doing when you retire?

작성자: 금*진
2022-04-27 369

회원님의 영작문

Although it remains a lot of years by retirement, my husband and I always think what we will do after the retirement.
What I’d like the best is traveling around the world with my husband. I really love traveling abroad so I’d like to make unforgettable memories through a lot of travels. The important thing to do this for us is that both of us have to be healthy for this dream.
Next, I’d like to run our own cafe with my husband. It isn’t only for income. We want to meet various people, spend our spare time and not to bored by running a cozy cafe. When we dream that, it makes us smile.
I hope these dreams will come true after the retirement.

1. I think that talking about politics with many people is an elephant in the room.
2. If I had known in advance, I would've not talked about an elephant in the room to my roommate.
3. Could you tell me about your elephant in the room?

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Chloe! 

That sounds like a nice way to enjoy your retirement. I hope you guys can achieve that in the future. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon. 

Although it remains a lot of years by retirement, my husband and I always think what we will do after the retirement.
>> Although there are still a lot of year remaining before we retire, my husband and I always think about what we will do after our retirement.

What I’d like the best is traveling around the world with my husband. 
>> CORRECT

I really love traveling abroad so I’d like to make unforgettable memories through a lot of travels. 
>> I really love traveling abroad so I’d like to make unforgettable memories through that. 

The important thing to do this for us is that both of us have to be healthy for this dream.
>> The important thing to do is to remain healthy for this dream. 

Next, I’d like to run our own cafe with my husband. 
>> Next, I’d like to run a cafe with my husband. 

It isn’t only for income. 
>> CORRECT

We want to meet various people, spend our spare time and not to bored by running a cozy cafe. 
>> We want to meet various people, spend our spare time and not be bored by running a cozy cafe. 

When we dream that, it makes us smile.
>> Whenever we dream about that, it makes us smile. 

I hope these dreams will come true after the retirement.
>> I hope these dreams will come true after my retirement. 


1. I think that talking about politics with many people is an elephant in the room.
>> 1. I think that talking about politics with many people is like having an elephant in the room 

2. If I had known in advance, I would've not talked about an elephant in the room to my roommate.
> 2. If I had known in advance, I would've not talked about the elephant in the room to my roommate.

3. Could you tell me about your elephant in the room?
>> 3. Could you tell me about the elephant in the room?

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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
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