¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you can change something about your lifestyle, what would it be and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ý*Áø
2022-04-25 216

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If I can change something about my lifestyle, I would like to change a lot of things.
First of all, I¡¯m a night owl. So, I want to be a morning person. When I wake up early, I can spend more time in the morning and start a day leisurely. I want to be more diligent and spend a day efficiently.
Next, I¡¯m a picky eater. Although I don't like seafood and vegetables, I really enjoy eating meat. As I¡¯m getting older, I think it¡¯s getting better. However, I feel I have to try more than now.
Lastly, I tend to eat meals before I¡¯m starving. I have a lot of appetite. Because of these, I often tend to have an upset stomach. I don't really want to feel this trouble so I try to eat something when I feel hungry.
As I mentioned, I want to change these things. If I change them, I would be a healthier and fabulous person.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Chloe! 

These changes can really change your lifestyle more efficiently. I hope you will be successful in doing so. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon. 

If I can change something about my lifestyle, I would like to change a lot of things.
>> CORRECT

First of all, I¡¯m a night owl s
>>First of all, I¡¯m a night owl so I want to be a morning person. 

So, I want to be a morning person. 
>> CONNECT WITH THE SENTENCE ABOVE. 

When I wake up early, I can spend more time in the morning and start a day leisurely. 
>> CORRECT

I want to be more diligent and spend a day efficiently.
>> CORRECT

Next, I¡¯m a picky eater. 
>> CORRECT

Although I don't like seafood and vegetables, I really enjoy eating meat. 
>> CORRECT

As I¡¯m getting older, I think it¡¯s getting better. 
>>CORRECT
OR: As I get older, I think it¡¯s getting better. 

However, I feel I have to try more than now.
>> However, I feel I have to try more than before.

Lastly, I tend to eat meals before I¡¯m starving. 
>> CORRECT

I have a lot of appetite. 
>> CORRECT
OR: I have a big appetite. 

Because of these, I often tend to have an upset stomach. 
>> CORRECT

I don't really want to feel this trouble so I try to eat something when I feel hungry.
>> I don't really want to experience this trouble so I try to eat something when I feel hungry.

As I mentioned, I want to change these things. 
>> CORRECT

If I change them, I would be a healthier and fabulous person.
>> If I change them, I would be a healthier and fabulous person.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118152 Where is the best place to have a birthday party? And Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 157
118151 Who do you spend most of your free time with? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 1
118150 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 332
118149 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 425
118148 If you will invest your money in something, what would it be and... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 168
118147 If you will invest your money in something, what would it be and... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 0
118146 Stock Market ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 131
118145 What was your favorite food as a child? Explain in detail. ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 5
118144 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 1
118143 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 125
118142 The best place to have a birtday party. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 105
118141 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 2
118140 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 1
118139 What do you like the most about the South Korean educational... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 98
118138 Why Bloomberg? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 110
118137 Waste ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 173
118136 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 331
118135 How should someone who committed a crime for some good cause be... Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 477
118134 Why Sales and Analytics? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 392
118133 Why Bloomberg? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-11 94

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04