¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you can change something about your lifestyle, what would it be and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ý*Áø
2022-04-25 319

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If I can change something about my lifestyle, I would like to change a lot of things.
First of all, I¡¯m a night owl. So, I want to be a morning person. When I wake up early, I can spend more time in the morning and start a day leisurely. I want to be more diligent and spend a day efficiently.
Next, I¡¯m a picky eater. Although I don't like seafood and vegetables, I really enjoy eating meat. As I¡¯m getting older, I think it¡¯s getting better. However, I feel I have to try more than now.
Lastly, I tend to eat meals before I¡¯m starving. I have a lot of appetite. Because of these, I often tend to have an upset stomach. I don't really want to feel this trouble so I try to eat something when I feel hungry.
As I mentioned, I want to change these things. If I change them, I would be a healthier and fabulous person.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Chloe! 

These changes can really change your lifestyle more efficiently. I hope you will be successful in doing so. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon. 

If I can change something about my lifestyle, I would like to change a lot of things.
>> CORRECT

First of all, I¡¯m a night owl s
>>First of all, I¡¯m a night owl so I want to be a morning person. 

So, I want to be a morning person. 
>> CONNECT WITH THE SENTENCE ABOVE. 

When I wake up early, I can spend more time in the morning and start a day leisurely. 
>> CORRECT

I want to be more diligent and spend a day efficiently.
>> CORRECT

Next, I¡¯m a picky eater. 
>> CORRECT

Although I don't like seafood and vegetables, I really enjoy eating meat. 
>> CORRECT

As I¡¯m getting older, I think it¡¯s getting better. 
>>CORRECT
OR: As I get older, I think it¡¯s getting better. 

However, I feel I have to try more than now.
>> However, I feel I have to try more than before.

Lastly, I tend to eat meals before I¡¯m starving. 
>> CORRECT

I have a lot of appetite. 
>> CORRECT
OR: I have a big appetite. 

Because of these, I often tend to have an upset stomach. 
>> CORRECT

I don't really want to feel this trouble so I try to eat something when I feel hungry.
>> I don't really want to experience this trouble so I try to eat something when I feel hungry.

As I mentioned, I want to change these things. 
>> CORRECT

If I change them, I would be a healthier and fabulous person.
>> If I change them, I would be a healthier and fabulous person.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120130 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 708
120129 What activity don\'t you do any more for leisure that you want... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 801
120128 How do you see yourself 10 years from now? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 717
120127 If exercise makes you live a lot longer, why do so many people... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 498
120126 The best country in the world ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 767
120125 How does the weather affect your mood? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 651
120124 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 640
120123 About the excersise. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 907
120122 What do you think is the best country in the world and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 811
120121 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 758
120120 Have you ever been caught in bad weather? If so, what did you do? À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 634
120119 Do you love spicy food? Why do some people love eating spicy... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 714
120118 my home2 ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 537
120117 What do you think children worry about most these days? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 0
120116 The second homework ÀÌ*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 1
120115 mistake ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 1
120114 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 2
120113 my home ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 572
120112 6.23. ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 576
120111 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04