¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What video game do you think is best and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-04-22 212

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, Minecraft is the best game I ever played.
I can do a lot of things in the game, and also it's interesting everyday.
Also it is keep updating so I can experience a lot of new sources in the game every year.
I can play some maps that are made by other players, and also I can play with other players.
Because of these reasons, I think that Minecraft is the best game that I ever played.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! 

Most kids nowadays love that! 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon. 

In my opinion, Minecraft is the best game I ever played.
>> CORRECT

I can do a lot of things in the game, and also it's interesting everyday.
>> I can do a lot of things in that game, and it's very interesting to play everyday.

Also it is keep updating so I can experience a lot of new sources in the game every year.
>> It keeps on updating so I can experience a lot of new sources in the game every year.

I can play some maps that are made by other players, and also I can play with other players.
>> I can play on some maps that are made by other players, and play with other players too. 

Because of these reasons, I think that Minecraft is the best game that I ever played.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117800 Would you leave a tip even if you thought the waiter or waitress... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 1
117799 What are the advantages of learning a foreign language? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 265
117798 Homework ½Å*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 0
117797 What are the possible benefits of working on weekends? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 148
117796 What is the worst vice for you? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 1
117795 If you can listen to one song every day, what would it be and... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 384
117794 Why don¡¯t all mothers feed their babies on breast milk? Isn¡¯t... ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 173
117793 What kind of future do you hope to have? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 314
117792 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 0
117791 3/28 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 328
117790 How do you deal with pressure or stressful situations? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 135
117789 My best TV show ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 186
117788 Writing Task (Mar 25th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 165
117787 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 3
117786 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 147
117785 Make sentence ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 208
117784 Weekends ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 2
117783 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 315
117782 Tell me something about your country? / What do you like about... ÁÖ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 433
117781 Do you prefer playing or watching sports? Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 495

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04