¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What video game do you think is best and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-04-22 178

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, Minecraft is the best game I ever played.
I can do a lot of things in the game, and also it's interesting everyday.
Also it is keep updating so I can experience a lot of new sources in the game every year.
I can play some maps that are made by other players, and also I can play with other players.
Because of these reasons, I think that Minecraft is the best game that I ever played.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! 

Most kids nowadays love that! 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon. 

In my opinion, Minecraft is the best game I ever played.
>> CORRECT

I can do a lot of things in the game, and also it's interesting everyday.
>> I can do a lot of things in that game, and it's very interesting to play everyday.

Also it is keep updating so I can experience a lot of new sources in the game every year.
>> It keeps on updating so I can experience a lot of new sources in the game every year.

I can play some maps that are made by other players, and also I can play with other players.
>> I can play on some maps that are made by other players, and play with other players too. 

Because of these reasons, I think that Minecraft is the best game that I ever played.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118081 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 94
118080 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 166
118079 sorry but there\'s a little bit more to review this time. ½Å*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 294
118078 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 200
118077 What was your favorite food as a child? Explain in detail. ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 513
118076 Amazing place ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 205
118075 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 243
118074 Is it important for children to have a pet? Why do people have... ¼º*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 390
118073 Homework ÇÏ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 159
118072 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 5
118071 Case ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 3
118070 punishment ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 532
118069 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 1
118068 In what ways are credit cards better than cash? Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 172
118067 Do you think fashion is important for people\'s lives? Why or... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-07 121
118066 How did you greet your teachers in Cebu, Philippines before? ±è*¾ç ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 108
118065 202.4.6 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 253
118064 Does education guarantee a good job? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 1
118063 What was your favorite food as a child? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-04-07 180
118062 Writing Task(Apr 5th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 299

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04