¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The Post Everything on Social Media

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*¹Î
2022-04-12 327

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't think that people need to post everything on social media. This is because that's really stress to myself. People don't satisfied just to post and that posters will get on one's nerves. Perhaps they will continue watch their phone to check the posters, because the posters usually have the heart and comments. So, they can't concentrate on working and life. I think that for this reason.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Kate!
You're back! 
I'm glad you're writing again.
This will be very good for your development.
I hope you continue to work hard every day.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
I don't think that people need to post everything on social media. 
>> Correct
This is because that's really stress to myself. 
>> This is because it would really be stressful for me. 
People don't satisfied just to post and that posters will get on one's nerves. 
>> People are not satisfied with just posting and they can get restless.
Perhaps they will continue watch their phone to check the posters, because the posters usually have the heart and comments. 
>> Perhaps they will continue to look at their phones to check the posts because they usually have likes and comments. 
So, they can't concentrate on working and life. 
>> Correct
I think that for this reason.
>> I think this is the reason. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116423 HOMEWORK: When and how do you check on someone¡¯s... ¼­*¾È ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 240
116422 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 1
116421 Would you like to eat out every day? Would this be healthy? ¼º*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 187
116420 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 1
116419 , ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 3
116418 What kind of challenge would you like to try? ¾ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 2
116417 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 1
116416 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 238
116415 Hug:) ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 155
116414 homework.5 ¾ç*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 272
116413 Q. Do you like meeting new people? Á¤*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 231
116412 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 562
116411 What is that one thing that you will not change about yourself... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 235
116410 What is the best and worst thing about traveling to a new... À±*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 3
116409 What is one unique way we can show our love to other people? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 627
116408 2/14 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 566
116407 Homework ¼Õ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 347
116406 homework(3) Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 155
116405 homework ¹Ú*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 335
116404 homework ¹Ú*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 288

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04