¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The Post Everything on Social Media

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*¹Î
2022-04-12 186

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't think that people need to post everything on social media. This is because that's really stress to myself. People don't satisfied just to post and that posters will get on one's nerves. Perhaps they will continue watch their phone to check the posters, because the posters usually have the heart and comments. So, they can't concentrate on working and life. I think that for this reason.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Kate!
You're back! 
I'm glad you're writing again.
This will be very good for your development.
I hope you continue to work hard every day.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
I don't think that people need to post everything on social media. 
>> Correct
This is because that's really stress to myself. 
>> This is because it would really be stressful for me. 
People don't satisfied just to post and that posters will get on one's nerves. 
>> People are not satisfied with just posting and they can get restless.
Perhaps they will continue watch their phone to check the posters, because the posters usually have the heart and comments. 
>> Perhaps they will continue to look at their phones to check the posts because they usually have likes and comments. 
So, they can't concentrate on working and life. 
>> Correct
I think that for this reason.
>> I think this is the reason. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118803 What is one dilemma you have nowadays? Answer in a few sentences. ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 163
118802 What (besides good food) makes a restaurant great? Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 192
118801 How about you? ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 225
118800 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 1
118799 For you, do you prefer the idea of extended or nuclear families? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 211
118798 5.3 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 170
118797 5.4 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 115
118796 5.6 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 157
118795 school uniform ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 238
118794 5.3 homework Çö*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 203
118793 What life lessons can we learn from playing sports? Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 183
118792 5.2 homework Çö*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 168
118791 How important is time in your culture? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 207
118790 4.28 homework Çö*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 188
118789 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 1
118788 4.26 homework Çö*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 110
118787 Your confirmation is required ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 180
118786 Your help is needed for then Green Cross account ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 1
118785 Long time no connection ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 1
118784 samsung clean core:BTP opportunity for services ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04