¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you could edit your memories, which ones would you erase and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-03-25 602

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't want to erase my memories.
Even tough there are some bad memories, and sad memories, the memories are memories.
We may think that bad memories are just useless things, but we can learn many things from bad memories.
We can feel more emotions and even we can empathize other people well.
Because of these reasons, I think all of my memories are meaningful memories to me.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! 

There are usually reasons behind why certain things happen in our life. There is always a purpose for it.  We just need to realize it. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I don't want to erase my memories.
>> CORRECT

Even tough there are some bad memories, and sad memories, the memories are memories.
>> Even though some of them are bad or sad, the memories are still memories.

We may think that bad memories are just useless things, but we can learn many things from bad memories.
>> We may think that bad memories are useless , but we can learn many things from them. 

We can feel more emotions and even we can empathize other people well.
>> We can feel more emotions and even we can feel empathy towards other people as well. 

Because of these reasons, I think all of my memories are meaningful memories to me.
>> Because of these reasons, I think all of my memories are meaningful to me.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117643 What can you bring to Bloomberg and customer service team? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 324
117642 Why Bloomberg customer service? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 513
117641 What keeps you awake at night sometimes? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 6
117640 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 145
117639 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 3
117638 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 685
117637 Do you think it is important for men to join the military... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 557
117636 homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 1
117635 Let¡¯s go to Jeju-do(island). ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 275
117634 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ÁøÇàÁß 2022-03-23 386
117633 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 302
117632 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 405
117631 What gift is good to bring to your host family? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 533
117630 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 3
117629 Military Service ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 450
117628 Why I like more star than moon. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 502
117627 Why I like more bacon than egg bokkeumbab. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 968
117626 How I keep clean my room ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 490
117625 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 354
117624 Writing Task(Mar 22th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-03-23 354

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04