¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing Task(Mar 22th, 2022)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³²*½Â
2022-03-23 445

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What are the advantages or disadvantages of modern medicine?
One advantage is that we can get over easily in a short period with modern medicine. There¡¯re millions of drugs we can buy at a drugstore or even at a convenience store.
However, the disadvantage comes from the same fact that we can buy nearly any medicine within 10 minutes, no matter where we are. Human body needs a kind of symptoms, like high fever, cough, soar throat, ant etc as a way of self cure and a certain level of immunity. But buying and taking the medicine easily, we don¡¯t allow our bodies to have those symptoms that are necessary to strength self-defense and immune system.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, U Seung! 

You are right! Having the modern medicine makes it easier for us to access it, especially during the emergencies. We should also not be too dependent on medicines because it can weaken our body at the same time.

Thank you for sharing!

~T. Roanne ^_^
=========================================
One advantage is that we can get over easily in a short period with modern medicine. 
>> Correct! 
There¡¯re millions of drugs we can buy at a drugstore or even at a convenience store.
>> Correct! 
However, the disadvantage comes from the same fact that we can buy nearly any medicine within 10 minutes, no matter where we are. 
>> Correct! 
Human body needs a kind of symptoms, like high fever, cough, soar throat, ant etc as a way of self cure and a certain level of immunity. 
>> The human body needs a kind of symptoms, like high fever, cough, sore throat, ant etc. as a way of self cure and a certain level of immunity. 
But buying and taking the medicine easily, we don¡¯t allow our bodies to have those symptoms that are necessary to strength self-defense and immune system.
>> But buying and taking the medicine easily, we don¡¯t allow our bodies to have those symptoms that are necessary to strengthen self-defense and immune system
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117479 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 1
117478 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 0
117477 HOMEWORK ¹è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 504
117476 How do you overcome stress at work? ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 640
117475 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 1
117474 Good evening! °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 349
117473 I would appreciate it if you could check the sentence below. ½Å*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 761
117472 About the development of technology. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 472
117471 Discipline method ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 2
117470 Can you give three examples of synonyms? / What are synonyms for? ÁÖ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 751
117469 Do you spend more free time with family or friends? What do you... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 420
117468 Do you think people would be less human if they had the organ of... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 653
117467 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 518
117466 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 658
117465 What are your weaknesses? Explain in detail. ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 606
117464 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 602
117463 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 907
117462 Homework ÇÏ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 2
117461 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 582
117460 ESSAY: Parents should be held responsible for their children\'s... Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 453

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04