¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing Task(Mar 22th, 2022)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³²*½Â
2022-03-23 376

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What are the advantages or disadvantages of modern medicine?
One advantage is that we can get over easily in a short period with modern medicine. There¡¯re millions of drugs we can buy at a drugstore or even at a convenience store.
However, the disadvantage comes from the same fact that we can buy nearly any medicine within 10 minutes, no matter where we are. Human body needs a kind of symptoms, like high fever, cough, soar throat, ant etc as a way of self cure and a certain level of immunity. But buying and taking the medicine easily, we don¡¯t allow our bodies to have those symptoms that are necessary to strength self-defense and immune system.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, U Seung! 

You are right! Having the modern medicine makes it easier for us to access it, especially during the emergencies. We should also not be too dependent on medicines because it can weaken our body at the same time.

Thank you for sharing!

~T. Roanne ^_^
=========================================
One advantage is that we can get over easily in a short period with modern medicine. 
>> Correct! 
There¡¯re millions of drugs we can buy at a drugstore or even at a convenience store.
>> Correct! 
However, the disadvantage comes from the same fact that we can buy nearly any medicine within 10 minutes, no matter where we are. 
>> Correct! 
Human body needs a kind of symptoms, like high fever, cough, soar throat, ant etc as a way of self cure and a certain level of immunity. 
>> The human body needs a kind of symptoms, like high fever, cough, sore throat, ant etc. as a way of self cure and a certain level of immunity. 
But buying and taking the medicine easily, we don¡¯t allow our bodies to have those symptoms that are necessary to strength self-defense and immune system.
>> But buying and taking the medicine easily, we don¡¯t allow our bodies to have those symptoms that are necessary to strengthen self-defense and immune system
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117886 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-31 325
117885 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-03-31 2
117884 Why is it that some people act differently in front of others? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-31 521
117883 Thank you for checking the English composition every time. ½Å*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-31 216
117882 civet coffee ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-31 193
117881 Which artists/bands do you want to see at a music festival?... ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-31 2
117880 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-31 1
117879 What are some of the advantages of cooking your meals at home?... ¾È*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-31 612
117878 What is the best restaurant in your town and what do they serve... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-31 493
117877 2022.3.30 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-03-31 468
117876 What will you do if you are in a restaurant and another Korean... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-31 0
117875 Do you suffer from nightmares? Can you remember any specific... Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-31 294
117874 What is the best gift you have ever received and why is it so... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-03-31 591
117873 Homework ÀÓ*ÃÑ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 1
117872 As a result of tourism, many historical buildings and sites are... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 6
117871 Thank you! °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 534
117870 In many countries recently young single people have been living... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 2
117869 3/30 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 590
117868 What kind of food are you sensitive to? ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 402
117867 Handsome is best hahaha ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-03-30 458

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04