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서비스 입니다.

How do you handle stress?

작성자: 류*선
2022-03-16 386

회원님의 영작문

When I'm stressed, I usually talk less than usual. Because I think a lot on my own. So I relieve stress by writing alone, praying, listening to music, and cleaning. Sometimes I tell my husband or my counselor about my concerns. I don't often talk about my worries to people around me. The reason is that I am a pastor who has been trained not to express my hardships in Korea. In Korean culture, if I expose and express my weaknesses, I'm seen as mentally weak. That's why people often hide their real feelings and thoughts. And I have to work hard to get what I want. I have a lot of stress living in America, but I didn't know how to deal with it. So I cried and prayed every day. During my counseling last year, I was able to recognize that I was not a good person for expressing my feelings. I thought I should learn how to find my true feelings and express them in a healthy way. That way, I think I can build healthy and good relationships with the people around me.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Ji Seon,
Thank you so much for sending in your ideas.
I appreciate it a lot!
Have an awesome day!
Take care!
Elly
How do you handle stress?
When I'm stressed, I usually talk less than usual. 
CORRECT!
or>>When I get stressed out, I normally talk less often than usual. 
Because I think a lot on my own. 
CORRECT!
or>>Because, I tend to just think more in a corner thank engage in a conversation. 
So I relieve stress by writing alone, praying, listening to music, and cleaning. 
CORRECT!
or>>So I get rid of my stress by writing alone, praying, listening to music, and cleaning. 
Sometimes, I tell my husband or my counselor about my concerns. 
CORRECT!
or>>There are times when I confide in my husband or in my counselor about my issues. 
I don't often talk about my worries to people around me. 
CORRECT!
or>>I don't often share my worries with the people around me. 
The reason is that I am a pastor who has been trained not to express my hardships in Korea. 
CORRECT!
or>>It is because I am a Korean pastor who has been accustomed not to express my difficulties to just anyone. 
In the Korean culture, if I expose and express my weaknesses, I'm seen as mentally weak. 
CORRECT!
or>>According to the Korean culture, if I open up and express my weaknesses, I'm perceived as a mentally weak person. 
That's why people often hide their real feelings and thoughts. 
CORRECT!
or>>That's the reason why most people often suppress their real feelings and thoughts. 
And I have to work hard to get what I want. 
CORRECT!
or>>And I have to work hard for the things I want to have in life. 
I have a lot of stress living in America, but I didn't know how to deal with it. 
CORRECT!
or>>I get stressed out a lot since living in America, but I didn't know how to deal with it. 
So I cried and prayed every day. 
CORRECT!
or>>Therefore, I cried and prayed on a daily basis. 
During my counseling last year, I was able to recognize that I was not a good person for expressing my feelings. 
>>During my counseling last year, I was able to recognize that I was not good in expressing my feelings. 
I thought I should learn how to find my true feelings and express them in a healthy way. 
CORRECT!
or>>I then thought of learning more in how to find my true feelings and express them in a healthy way. 
That way, I think I can build healthy and good relationships with the people around me.
CORRECT!
or>>That way, I might be able to build a healthy and good relationship with the people around me.
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