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How can political campaigns be better organized?

작성자: 김*경
2022-03-15 834

회원님의 영작문

I think there are three ways to be better organized political campaigns.
First, political campaigns should be controlled by a control tower not to confuse voters. As the saying goes, too many cooks spoil the broth.
Second, the main idea of campaigns should be repeated frequently to create a lasting impression on the voters. Therefore, the opposition party will try to get the candidate off message by bringing up policy or personal questions that are not related to the talking points. For example, in the 2008 American presidential election McCain originally used a message that focused on his patriotism: "Country First", later the message changed. However, Obama ran on a consistent, simple message of "Change" throughout his campaign, he became the first black president.
Third, the message should be broad enough to attract the most potential voters. A narrow message can't get support from various supporters. It only alienates voters or slows the candidate down.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi there Steve!

Thank you again for answering my homework! The ideas you presented here were all valid and were actually impressive as always. We already discussed this in earlier classes but this time, you added an emphasis on maintaining a main concept or message. I liked that one in particular because a good politician must stand by their words and be consistent with their ideals.

Anyway, for the corrections, just be mindful of some word choices, some words are more appropriate than others. If you noticed your corrections kept decreasing so I hope you can see the improvement and aim to perfect your writing skills one of these days!

Keep it up and have a good night!
-Teacher Violet.

     I think there are three ways to be better organized political campaigns.
>> I think there are three ways to have better organized political campaigns.

First, political campaigns should be controlled by a control tower not to confuse voters. 
>> CORRECT!

As the saying goes, too many cooks spoil the broth.
>> CORRECT!

Second, the main idea of campaigns should be repeated frequently to create a lasting impression on the voters.
>> CORRECT!

Therefore, the opposition party will try to get the candidate off message by bringing up policy or personal questions that are not related to the talking points. 
>> CORRECT!

For example, in the 2008 American presidential election McCain originally used a message that focused on his patriotism: "Country First", later the message changed. 
>> CORRECT!

     However, Obama ran on a consistent, simple message of "Change" throughout his campaign, he became the first black president.
>> However, Obama ran on a consistent, simple message of "Change" throughout his campaign, and he became the first black president.

Third, the message should be broad enough to attract the most potential voters. 
>> CORRECT!

A narrow message can't get support from various supporters. 
>> CORRECT!

It only alienates voters or slows the candidate down.
>> CORRECT!

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