¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

I don\\\'t want to change my field of specialization.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*ÁØ
2022-02-25 702

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If you have time, please try to answer this question. Observe proper punctuation and capitalization. If you have a chance, do you want to change your field of specialization?


Finally, I don¡¯t want to change my field. because I am really satisfied with my field .
That is related to the vocational rehabilitation of the disabled. I work with lots of disabled and non-disabled people together, they each work what they can.
I think anywhere, It is relatively difficult for the disabled to find a job. so the state provides work opportunities for people with disabilities. The company I run is the company for them.

And yet, what if I change my field, think again, now I don¡¯t know what is a good field to me
Anyway, I have to think and prepare some things for life after retirement. I will try to think about it as time permits.

I¡¯m sorry teater! I think my post is a bit long.
you said to me ¡° keep it up¡± ¡°keep up the hard work¡±, so if possible, I¡¯ll keep going!

thank you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Elliot!

Wow, your work is really helpful for humanity. I think it is a very challenging field. It makes you seem like a very respectable man with a big heart. 
Don't worry, it isn't that long, so please do not apologize . I am always glad to read your answers.
For today's corrections, I think only Punctuations (periods . and commas ,) should be used properly, as well as capitalization. Please capitalize (big letters) the first letters of the sentences. Also, please do not be afraid to use pronouns. For example  for the 4th correction, instead of repeating "people with disabilities", you can use "them" instead.

Be proud of your work!
-Teacher Violet

Finally, I don¡¯t want to change my field. because I am really satisfied with my field .
>> Finally, I don¡¯t want to change my field because I am really satisfied with it.

That is related to the vocational rehabilitation of the disabled. 
>> CORRECT! 

I work with lots of disabled and non-disabled people together, they each work what they can.
OR >> I work with lots of disabled and non-disabled people together, they each do what they can.

I think anywhere, It is relatively difficult for the disabled to find a job. so the state provides work opportunities for people with disabilities. 
>>I think anywhere, it is relatively difficult for the disabled to find a job, so the state provides work opportunities for them.

The company I run is the company for them.
>> CORRECT! 

And yet, what if I change my field, think again, now I don¡¯t know what is a good field to me
>>And yet, I think again, what if I change my field? Now I don¡¯t know what is a good field for me.

Anyway, I have to think and prepare some things for life after retirement. 
>> CORRECT! 

I will try to think about it as time permits.
>> CORRECT! 

I¡¯m sorry teater! I think my post is a bit long.
>>I¡¯m sorry teacher! I think my post is a bit long.

you said to me ¡° keep it up¡± ¡°keep up the hard work¡±, so if possible, I¡¯ll keep going!
>> You told me to ¡°keep it up¡± ¡°keep up the hard work¡±, so if possible, I¡¯ll keep going!

thank you.
>>Thank you.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116825 Do you travel with a lot of baggage or do you like to travel... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 4
116824 What is your favorite place in your city and why? º¯*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 963
116823 What are some of the advantages of books vs. movies? How about... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 605
116822 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 1
116821 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 805
116820 I don\\\'t want to change my field of specialization. ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 702
116819 Do you think that meeting people online is easier than meeting... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 4
116818 Why do you study English? ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 0
116817 Essay (Feb 24th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 409
116816 . ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 650
116815 Writing Task (Feb 23th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 509
116814 Which one do you think is better, living in a country that has 2... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 418
116813 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 418
116812 When was the last time you visited a doctor? Why did you visit... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 476
116811 2022.2.24 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 467
116810 The things that have fruit smells Ȳ*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 331
116809 What do you like most about family gatherings? Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 530
116808 Which one do you think is better, living in a country that has 2... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 467
116807 What important thing do you bring when you travel? Why? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 1
116806 What should we do to stay safe these days? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04