¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

I don\\\'t want to change my field of specialization.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*ÁØ
2022-02-25 616

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If you have time, please try to answer this question. Observe proper punctuation and capitalization. If you have a chance, do you want to change your field of specialization?


Finally, I don¡¯t want to change my field. because I am really satisfied with my field .
That is related to the vocational rehabilitation of the disabled. I work with lots of disabled and non-disabled people together, they each work what they can.
I think anywhere, It is relatively difficult for the disabled to find a job. so the state provides work opportunities for people with disabilities. The company I run is the company for them.

And yet, what if I change my field, think again, now I don¡¯t know what is a good field to me
Anyway, I have to think and prepare some things for life after retirement. I will try to think about it as time permits.

I¡¯m sorry teater! I think my post is a bit long.
you said to me ¡° keep it up¡± ¡°keep up the hard work¡±, so if possible, I¡¯ll keep going!

thank you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Elliot!

Wow, your work is really helpful for humanity. I think it is a very challenging field. It makes you seem like a very respectable man with a big heart. 
Don't worry, it isn't that long, so please do not apologize . I am always glad to read your answers.
For today's corrections, I think only Punctuations (periods . and commas ,) should be used properly, as well as capitalization. Please capitalize (big letters) the first letters of the sentences. Also, please do not be afraid to use pronouns. For example  for the 4th correction, instead of repeating "people with disabilities", you can use "them" instead.

Be proud of your work!
-Teacher Violet

Finally, I don¡¯t want to change my field. because I am really satisfied with my field .
>> Finally, I don¡¯t want to change my field because I am really satisfied with it.

That is related to the vocational rehabilitation of the disabled. 
>> CORRECT! 

I work with lots of disabled and non-disabled people together, they each work what they can.
OR >> I work with lots of disabled and non-disabled people together, they each do what they can.

I think anywhere, It is relatively difficult for the disabled to find a job. so the state provides work opportunities for people with disabilities. 
>>I think anywhere, it is relatively difficult for the disabled to find a job, so the state provides work opportunities for them.

The company I run is the company for them.
>> CORRECT! 

And yet, what if I change my field, think again, now I don¡¯t know what is a good field to me
>>And yet, I think again, what if I change my field? Now I don¡¯t know what is a good field for me.

Anyway, I have to think and prepare some things for life after retirement. 
>> CORRECT! 

I will try to think about it as time permits.
>> CORRECT! 

I¡¯m sorry teater! I think my post is a bit long.
>>I¡¯m sorry teacher! I think my post is a bit long.

you said to me ¡° keep it up¡± ¡°keep up the hard work¡±, so if possible, I¡¯ll keep going!
>> You told me to ¡°keep it up¡± ¡°keep up the hard work¡±, so if possible, I¡¯ll keep going!

thank you.
>>Thank you.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116546 2/17 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 331
116545 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 1
116544 They say exercise helps improve mood. How? Write at least 5... Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 362
116543 Chemical firms on high alert for toughened safety law À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 1
116542 HOMEWORK ¹è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 173
116541 89-year-old graduates college with highest honors À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 1
116540 I think I\'m going to work ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 334
116539 Stocks:) ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 296
116538 use of the phone ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 423
116537 Do you think marriage is important? Why or why not? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 144
116536 Do you exercise? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 3
116535 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 122
116534 What do you think about voting? Is it a good way to make... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 422
116533 Does your family have a movie night? Tell me about it. ¾ö*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 365
116532 29.30.31 ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 339
116531 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 1
116530 When I got a job, I moved out of my parents\' house. ±è*Å ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 1
116529 Is giving a good first impression important? ±è*Å ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 1
116528 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 150
116527 How do you feel and what do you do after a long vacation?... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04