¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why I think learning English is important.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼º
2022-02-20 540

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think learning English is important.
That is because when we don't learn English, we failed at the entrance exam.
My second reason is when we don't learn English, we can't do communicate with foreigners.
My third reason is when we don't learn English, it is impossible to learn another subject. That is because there are so many English is in at our subjects.
Finally, when we have mastered this English, we have so much money from the government.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Joey!   The overall content of your work is comprehensible. Good job!  

Please take note of the corrections. 


- Teacher Debbie

I think learning English is important.
>> This is a good sentence.

That is because when we don't learn English, we failed at the entrance exam.
>> That is because when we don't learn English, we will fail an entrance exam.

My second reason is when we don't learn English, we can't do communicate with foreigners.
>> Moreover, we won't be able to communicate with foreigners.

My third reason is when we don't learn English, it is impossible to learn another subject. 
>> When we don't learn English, it will be impossible to learn another subject. 

That is because there are so many English is in at our subjects.
>> That is because there are so many English words in other subjects.

Finally, when we have mastered this English, we have so much money from the government.
>> When we have mastered English, we can get so much money from the government.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116393 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 4
116392 What are your dreams or goals in life? / What will you do to... ÁÖ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 255
116391 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 268
116390 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 2
116389 What is that one thing that you will not change about yourself... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 381
116388 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 573
116387 Home work ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 484
116386 Claire\'s Homework ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 887
116385 Homework(2/11) ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 0
116384 What do you love about your work? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 2
116383 Home work ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 604
116382 Why do you think school clubs or organizations are important? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 152
116381 My Personality ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 538
116380 HOMEWORK: Why is it easy or hard for you to introduce someone to... ¼­*¾È ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 396
116379 What makes socializing difficult? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 0
116378 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 671
116377 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 211
116376 lesson 2 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 501
116375 Why do you think people don\'t like to practice gardening? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 3
116374 lesson 2 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 652

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04