¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

good traveling

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¿À*°á
2022-02-14 353

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello! i'm daniel
Today I will introduce my travels. Let's go!
January 31, 2022 This day was the beginning of the New Year holiday.
Our family visited Sokcho Resort. with grandmather.
We ate delicious food, had fun at the water park, and played fun games during dinner time.
The bed in the resort felt good when lying down.
My brother slept warmly at 12pm.
We woke up and it was February 1st, the beginning of a new month,
We went to a famous restaurant and had a delicious breakfast.
and came home
I think it's good to go on this trip with my grandmother.
Our family decided to go on a trip on the last day of February. When that time comes, I will tell you an interesting story through this novel. Thanks for listening to me! a happy day!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Daniel! It's good to know that you had so much traveling with your family and grandma. Thanks for sharing! Keep safe and see you later! :)

~ Teacher Annie



Hello! i'm daniel
>>Hello! I'm Daniel.
Today I will introduce my travels.
>>Correct!
>>OR: Today I will you about my travels.
 Let's go!
>>Correct!
>>OR: Let's start!
January 31, 2022 This day was the beginning of the New Year holiday.
>>The 31st of January, 2022  was the beginning of the New Year holiday.
Our family visited Sokcho Resort. with grandmather.
>>Our family visited Sokcho Resort with grandmother.
We ate delicious food, had fun at the water park, and played fun games during dinner time.
>>Correct!
The bed in the resort felt good when lying down.
>>It was good to lie down on the resort's bed.
My brother slept warmly at 12pm.
>>Correct!
>> My brother went to bed at 12 pm warmly.
We woke up and it was February 1st, the beginning of a new month,
>> The next day, we woke up to find it was February 1st, the beginning of a new month.
We went to a famous restaurant and had a delicious breakfast.
>>Correct!
and came home
>>Then, we went home.
I think it's good to go on this trip with my grandmother.
>>Correct!
Our family decided to go on a trip on the last day of February.
>>Correct!
>>OR: Our family decided to go on a trip again on the last day of February.
 When that time comes, I will tell you an interesting story through this novel.
>> When that time comes, I will tell you an interesting story through this essay.
 Thanks for listening to me!
>> Thanks for reading my composition.
  a happy day!
>>Have a happy day ahead!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115899 Who is the teacher that inspired you the most when you were... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 883
115898 If you had to lose one of your senses(sight, smell, hearing,... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 365
115897 Because of people\'s greed ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 169
115896 Can you name three jobs you can be good at? ¾ö*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 260
115895 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 668
115894 Household chores ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 930
115893 Can money buy happiness? Àå*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 566
115892 What is the worst age to be and why? ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 347
115891 What do you want to include in your ideal fitness program? Àå*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 812
115890 Writing correction ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 0
115889 Writing correction - 1 ±è*¿µ ÁøÇàÁß 2022-01-25 0
115888 Writing correction - 1 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 0
115887 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 242
115886 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 1
115885 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 1
115884 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 1
115883 Do you think that older people are always right? Why or why not? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 458
115882 sorry for absent °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 0
115881 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 1231
115880 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-25 478

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04