¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is that one thing that you will not change about yourself and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-02-14 466

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, I will not change my thoughts about justice.
I saw a lot of people who did bad things only because of money.
Of course we can earn money, but we should act inside of justice.
But some people get out of justice and do something that they shouldn't do.
And I don't wanna be one of them.
So for me, the one thing that I won't change about myself is the thoughts about justice.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John:)

That's a good thing that even if you're still young, you know your stand in terms of justice. :)

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

In my opinion, I will not change my thoughts about justice.
>> CORRECT

I saw a lot of people who did bad things only because of money.
>> CORRECT

Of course we can earn money, but we should act inside of justice.
>> Of course we can earn money, but we should act in the side of justice.

But some people get out of justice and do something that they shouldn't do.
>> But some people refuse to do so and they still do things that are illegal. 

And I don't wanna be one of them.
>> CORRECT

So for me, the one thing that I won't change about myself is the thoughts about justice.
>> So for me, the one thing that I won't change about myself  are my thoughts about justice.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117244 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-11 964
117243 What is your reaction now that Yoon Seok-youl is the new... º¯*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-11 304
117242 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-11 1
117241 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-11 550
117240 I would appreciate it if you could review the sentence below. ½Å*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-11 798
117239 2022.3.10 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-03-11 756
117238 What is the difference between families now compared to families... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-03-11 2
117237 Tough cookie Ȳ*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-11 1137
117236 What is your reaction now that Yoon Seok-youl is the new... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-03-11 490
117235 Writing Task (Mar 10th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1202
117234 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1
117233 Are you in favor of abortion? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 0
117232 What is your reaction now that Yoon Seok-youl is the new... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 544
117231 3/10 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 242
117230 my dog Çö*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 0
117229 Why I think it is important to having friends. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 853
117228 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 2
117227 I want to go camping with my family. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 808
117226 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1027
117225 HOMEWORK ¹è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 403

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04