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My best day.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Le*
2022-02-10 215

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®



Wow!Escape the heat!Leaving the city's heat and going to Yongpyeong resort for a vacation was the best day of my life.Yongpyeong resort is famous for its ski in winter.However,in summer, it's famous for its leisure sports.I rode some amusment park rides and rode a cable car going up to the peak of the Balwangsan mountain,which is 1458m above sea level.I can almost see the whole world.I was so happy and I thought I was in the highest part of the world.Next, I went to the water park and it was so cool.Also in evening,me and my parents had a little party with chicken and coke.It was a busy but a wonderful time.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Leo!

Wow! That's nice! Thank you for sharing about it. Have a great day!

~T. Roanne  ^_^
========================================
CORRECTIONS AND SUGGESTIONS BELOW:

Wow!Escape the heat!
>> Wow! Escape the heat!
Leaving the city's heat and going to Yongpyeong resort for a vacation was the best day of my life.
>> Correct! 
Yongpyeong resort is famous for its ski in winter.
>> Correct! 
However,in summer, it's famous for its leisure sports.
>> However, in summer, it's famous for its leisurely sports.
I rode some amusment park rides and rode a cable car going up to the peak of the Balwangsan mountain,which is 1458m above sea level.
>> I rode some amusement park rides and rode a cable car going up to the peak of the Balwangsan mountain, which is 1458m above sea level.
I can almost see the whole world.
>> Correct! 
I was so happy and I thought I was in the highest part of the world.
>> Correct! 
Next, I went to the water park and it was so cool.
>> Correct! 
Also in evening,me and my parents had a little party with chicken and coke.
>> Also in the evening, me and my parents had a little party with a chicken and coke.
It was a busy but a wonderful time.
>>It was a busy, but a wonderful time.

NOTE: PLEASE DON'T FORGET THE SPACING ^^
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