¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

online

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2022-02-08 719

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

We are using online apps in many parts of our lives.
Sometimes I am very afraid so many apps because online is an anonymous space.
Online apps are convenient and save time specially to young people.
But it is true that it is very shocking to old people such as this changing.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Ms. Lily! 
Change is inevitable. Should we resist or accept? Thank you for sharing your thoughts. have a great day
Aki~

We are using online apps in many parts of our lives.
>>> Correct!
OR >>> The use of different apps are already part of or lives.
Sometimes I am very afraid so many apps because online is an anonymous space.
>>> Sometimes, I am very afraid with so many apps because online is an anonymous space.
Online apps are convenient and save time specially to young people.
>>> Online apps are convenient and save time especially to young people
But it is true that it is very shocking to old people such as this changing.
>>> In fact, this is very shocking to the old generation because of the changes brought by these apps.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116853 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 429
116852 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 642
116851 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 1248
116850 What are some good things or bad things about having a computer? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 390
116849 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 0
116848 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 2
116847 WRITING ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 0
116846 WRITING ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 0
116845 WRITING ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 0
116844 lesson 6 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 531
116843 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 620
116842 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 742
116841 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 5
116840 Which one do you think is better, living in a country that has 2... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 0
116839 Which one do you think is better, living in a country that has 2... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 767
116838 What do you think is the best company to work at in your country... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 0
116837 If you can pick a superpower that you can have, what would it be... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 0
116836 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 2
116835 What was the most boring movie you watched? Share your answer in... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 500
116834 Home work ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-25 397

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04