¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Sports Facilities

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*¿ì
2022-02-07 1254

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

To improve our city condition, I think sports facilities should be built, because many people in my city like sports, but there are not enough facilities. It will make my city very active.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Alex :)

Wow! That's so efficient. This can help a lot in terms of the health of the people. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

To improve our city condition, I think sports facilities should be built, because many people in my city like sports, but there are not enough facilities. 
>> To improve our city's condition, I think sports facilities should be built because many people here like sports, but there are not enough facilities. 

It will make my city very active.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115624 Are simple joys as valuable as complex experiences? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-16 163
115623 If you could stop a bad habit that you have, what would you stop? Àå*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-16 409
115622 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-16 377
115621 How do you think can we encourage people to take the COVID-19... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-01-16 212
115620 Stay healthy ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-16 1
115619 Should companies focus more on clean technology?. ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-16 546
115618 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-16 1
115617 How do you handle pressure? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-15 102
115616 How do you try to relieve stress? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-15 126
115615 Are people always honest when they make excuses? ¾ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-01-15 0
115614 Why do you think family gatherings are important? À±*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-15 3
115613 What is your birthday wish this year? Answer in a few sentences. ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-15 340
115612 If you could travel back in time, where would you go? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-01-15 411
115611 Do you think learning how to play an instrument is important?... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 510
115610 b Çö*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 1
115609 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 140
115608 How do you think can we encourage people to take the COVID-19... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 132
115607 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 171
115606 What advice would you give someone who is very busy? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 303
115605 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-14 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04