¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

It is easy to be worse the global warming, but it\'s hard to restore

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2022-01-26 466

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I do a lot of things that can affect to global warming. When I ride a car, then 59 gram of CO2 leak for 1 km. And when I use air conditional in summer, then 258 gram of CO2 leak for hour. Aside from these, I used appliances and transportation and leak lots of CO2 a day. Think that about 7500000000 people live like it. There will be too much CO2 in this world! In addition, there are lots of factories that leak CO2. In the case of a steam power plant, 991 gram of CO2 to produce 1 kWh. Then how can we try not to leak CO2 as possible as small? The way is simple. It's just reducing the frequency of using car and appliances which are not vital. We should use nature. For example, we can use the cool air in the mountain or wind instead of air conditional. And we can ride bike or running instead of car if the distance is short. Finally, we have to build lots of nuclear power plants. This power plant produce lots of electricity with leaking small CO2. However, we should try to do the first way.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Daniel! Your work is amazing! You researched your answer. I learned a lot from your homework. Superb! However, take note of the corrections to improve more,

- Teacher Debbie

I do a lot of things that can affect to global warming. 
>> I do a lot of things that contribute to global warming.

When I ride a car, then 59 gram of CO2 leak for 1 km. 
>> When I ride a car, 59 grams of CO2 leaks every kilometer.

And when I use air conditional in summer, then 258 gram of CO2 leak for hour. 
>> Moreover, when I use the air conditioner in summer, 258 grams of CO2 leak every hour.

Aside from these, I used appliances and transportation and leak lots of CO2 a day.
>> Aside from these,  I used appliances and transportation which give off a lot of CO2 a day.

Think that about 7500000000 people live like it.
>> Imagine about 7,500,000,000 people living like this.

There will be too much CO2 in this world! 
>> This is a good sentence.

In addition, there are lots of factories that leak CO2.
>> This is a good sentence.

In the case of a steam power plant, 991 gram of CO2 to produce 1 kWh. 
>> In the case of a steam power plant, 991 grams of CO2 produce 1 kWh. 

Then how can we try not to leak CO2 as possible as small? 
>> Then how can we prevent CO2 leakage?

The way is simple. 
>> It is simple.

It's just reducing the frequency of using car and appliances which are not vital.
>> It's just reducing the frequency of using cars and appliances, which are not vital.

We should use nature.
>> We should make use of nature.

 For example, we can use the cool air in the mountain or wind instead of air conditional. 
>> For example, we can make use of a mountain's cool air or wind instead of air conditioners.

And we can ride bike or running instead of car if the distance is short. 
>> In addition, we can ride bikes or run instead of using cars if the distance is short.

Finally, we have to build lots of nuclear power plants. 
>> This is a good sentence.

This power plant produce lots of electricity with leaking small CO2. 
>> This power plant produces lots of electricity but leaks little CO2. 

However, we should try to do the first way.
>> However, we should try to reduce car and appliance usage first.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116100 Claire\'s Homework ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-05 433
116099 2/4 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-05 710
116098 What are the things you need these days? ¾ö*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-05 417
116097 What do you think should be done to improve living conditions in... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-02-05 661
116096 Homework (Fri, Feb 4th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-02-05 384
116095 Korea launhes mobile driver\\\'s license trial À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 2
116094 That\'s useless think ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 436
116093 What do you think should be done to improve living conditions in... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 281
116092 I\'m positive for my future ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 209
116091 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 1015
116090 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 420
116089 Homework (Feb 3th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 1180
116088 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 1
116087 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 446
116086 How would you describe the difference between a vice and an... ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 348
116085 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 1159
116084 What are you looking forward to this 2022 and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 937
116083 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 472
116082 Home work ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 1505
116081 Writing correction ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-04 597

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04