¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

According to my experience....

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2022-01-06 1130

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my case, first way is putting the earphones and listened to 'Faded'. It's one of the most famous pop songs, but it brings me peace to me. According to my experience(?), in very loud place I can't listen to musics like classic. In the case of Faded, it is proper loud, but it brings me peace. I think this song makes me in the stopped time. I recommend this song to you when you want to in the stopped time in the loud place. Second way is thinking and feeling the happiest moment in your life. And close your eyes. When I do it, I think I'm in stopped time, too. In addition, I can raise self-esteem, and think me that I have lots of good memories. It is just based on my experience, so finding your own way is better thing.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Daniel! Thank you for answering your homework. Please take note of the corrections.


- Teacher Debbie

Homework:  How do you find peace and quiet in a loud area?

According to my experience(?), in very loud place I can't listen to musics like classic. 
>> In my experience, I couldn't listen loudly to music, like classical music, when I was in a noisy place.  

In my case, first way is putting the earphones and listened to 'Faded'. 
>> Therefore, when I'm in a loud place, first, I wear my earphones and listen to "Faded."

It's one of the most famous pop songs, but it brings me peace to me.
>> It's one of the most famous pop songs, but it brings me peace.

In the case of Faded, it is proper loud, but it brings me peace. 
>> It is quite loud, but it calms me.

I think this song makes me in the stopped time.
>> I think this song freezes time.

 I recommend this song to you when you want to in the stopped time in the loud place. 
>>  I recommend you listen to this song when you want to freeze time while in a loud place.

Second way is thinking and feeling the happiest moment in your life. And close your eyes. 
>> Second, I think about the happiest moment in my life and close my eyes.

When I do it, I think I'm in stopped time, too. 
>> When I do these, I think time stops, too.

In addition, I can raise self-esteem, and think me that I have lots of good memories.
>> In addition, I feel more confident whenever I think of lots of good memories.

It is just based on my experience, so finding your own way is better thing.
>> These are based on my experience, so finding your own way to find peace and quiet is better.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115044 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 99
115043 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 0
115042 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 2
115041 information technology is changing many aspects of our lives and... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 96
115040 Christmas ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 103
115039 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 188
115038 What are you most grateful for this Christmas and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 0
115037 Christmas!! ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 2713
115036 Choose between these holidays and explain your choice: ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 172
115035 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 1
115034 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 722
115033 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 544
115032 Are banks the best place to keep your money in? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 161
115031 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 389
115030 Older divorcees outnumber young ones À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 1
115029 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 472
115028 homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 524
115027 Are older people actually wiser? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 1
115026 Why my favorite cartoon character is mickey mouse ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 114
115025 Why I have a birthday party with my friends ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-12-27 341

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04